Ahhhhh.....assignments

I handed in two assignments yesterday that have each taken me a long time to complete. It was a pretty cool feeling to complete them.
One has been on my radar for approx. two years. I could have completed it at any time but I didn't quite understand it, so instead of trying to figure it out, I left it. This month I forced myself to take the time, sit down and get it done. Well,now I get it, I understand the assignment and the purpose behind it and I am glad that I completed it.
The second assignment was a physical requirement and a mental one. The assignment was to complete 26,000 push ups in six months. The first year that I attempted this, I didn't quite understand the concept of completing push ups EVERYDAY, and only completed approx 1/2 of them. Last year, I had my goal in sight and hurt my back towards the end and needed to take a mini-break from kung fu and push ups. This year, I learned that the battle is not physical alone, it is mental as well. If you tell yourself that you can't do it, or that you have no time for it, it will come true. If you work hard and figure out where to fit the push ups in, it becomes easier. It does not matter what changes in my life occur, I will always fit in my push ups. I still have 20,000 to complete this year for my UBBT challenge and I am confident that I will complete them.
It feels good to complete something that you have have been working towards for a long time, there is deep satisfaction in it.
Until next week, work hard and have fun.

Ouch!!!!

I hurt my back this afternoon, I was bending over to put the basket for cutlery back in the dishwasher and something changed (it also lends to my 'it's never anything cool' theory). I can't put my finger on exactly what but there was a definite shift and it hurt like crazy to straighten up. So now I am sitting on my couch with an ice pack on my back. This is an immense improvement from my usual response to injury. I usually deny that it really hurts and keep moving until I can't move anymore. I am learning.
The irony of the whole thing is that I had a really intense workout this morning and I feel like I am on the verge of a break through with my form. It feels like it is starting to change, or ready to change, it feels like I have nearly got it. I am not sure what it is yet but it feels pretty cool. I am sure that I won't lose that feeling as I wait for my back to rest, because the whole change started with me thinking differently about the form and approaching it differently and now I think that I can begin to put those thoughts into action.
This is a very exciting time for me and my martial arts, I am beginning to figure things out and learn from myself. I get how I learn and I am taking the time to allow myself to do it.
Woohoo!!!!!

Back to the grind or not

I returned from my camping trip on Wed. night and had left myself only one day to do all the chores required from such a trip. This means that Thurs. was crazy busy with laundry and errands and getting organized to start the work week. I think I like being busy like that, it seems like if I have too much time on my hands then I relax too much and I am not as productive.
I love getting back to work after a holiday or break. I have renewed energy and passion for my work that I didn't realize was waning until I got some rest. This is the beginning of my year, I take a big break in the summer and then come back ready to charge into a new year with vigor. I am excitedly planning my next suicide prevention workshop, checking in with the new staff members that I am training, supervising a new treatment program and re-establishing my team. I love it. I have always loved the beginning of the school year, what with the new faces, new books, etc. So it seems fitting that my work year begins each September with new ideas and enthusiasm.
So that has been my week in a nut shell, I am very happy to be back training with my kung fu friends. It is so energizing to be around people who are working hard and having fun.
My goal for this week is to fit in more time to practice yoga, it feels fabulous when I do it, I just need to find a spot for it.
Until next week, work hard and have fun.

Different training

So training while camping certainly took on a different look then I imagined that it would. I imagined (romanticized) practicing my forms in the fresh air of an isolated camping ground, doing tai chi in the peace and quiet that required little effort to stay focused. The reality was that I found different things to do everyday that challenged my physical being. I carried 5 gallon containers of water from the water pump back to our camp (I used to drive), I walked my dogs three times a day because there was no safe place to let them run and get their exercise, and I did my forms in my head. This took on a different turn than ever before because now I can imagine actually executing the moves on someone. It was a very good experience.
I think that one of the things that I like the most about camping that there is always something to do or take care of, from preparing meals to ensuring that our living space is looked after, to playing cribbage with my daughter. There is never a dull moment and instead of trying to fit kung fu into my life, it quite naturally was a part of my life. It is in how I breath, how I organize my day and how I treat myself and those around me. It is part of me.

Progress

This week has been a struggle as I attempted to implement the things that I learned last week into more of my movements. Each workout consisted of concentration, focus and using my eye for detail. It was exhausting mentally and I am not sure that I took very many steps forward. By the end of the week, I was sure that a demonstration of my form would show that I was actually taking steps backward instead of forward. My teacher assured me that it was progress to get stuck and have to try and figure things out. In comparison, last week was easy, I worked hard and the results were that I figured something out and rode on that high for the rest of the week. This week, I worked just as hard trying to implement the changes but I didn't figure anything out, I just worked hard. This week is more like a normal week than the other, making progress by practicing is what it is all about, just a little hard to swallow after a big break through.
Til next week, work hard and have fun.