Positive in....positive out !

I have been doing a lot of practice with my friends over the past ten days and it has definitely had a positive effect on my training and on my outlook in general. I spend too much of my training time by myself and it is a treat that I get to hang with my friends and team mates. I loved being at open training on Saturday, there was so much positive energy in the room, it almost made you work harder and concentrate more.
Life has thrown me a couple of curve balls lately and I think that I am managing better than I could be because of the time I have spent training with my friends and re-introducing daily tai chi to my life. I have also shared many laughs with people at dinner, brunch and tea and that has also helped me to stay positive.

ps
I had a really good idea of what I was going to say earlier today but was not near my computer, now it is not really coming to me, sorry for not flowing blog :{

sometimes....

Sometimes life is hard.....good thing tomorrow is a new day :)

did you know????

This week is mental health awareness week!
We are all affected by mental health issues, even if we are not aware of it. Some have a friend or family member that struggles with every day living, some know folks that struggle during different seasons and some are affected by the people that they meet in their lives. I am not just talking about the obvious ones that you see and hear when you meet someone, I am talking about the ones that are silent. When someone suffers from depression or anxiety, you can't always tell by looking. They usual suffer in silent or share their struggles with those closest to them and appear well put together and confident when dealing with the rest of the world. They become experts at presenting themselves as cool and confident. I have met many people that society would label as "normal" that struggle everyday based on the chemicals in their brains.
We always talk about spreading awareness, being more accepting and not judging and I think that what we need to do is stop stereotyping and assuming that someone is a certain way based on what they look like and what they do. If we could possibly treat each person that we encounter in our everyday lives with dignity and respect that we would be a lot closer to that acceptance thing. We don't know by looking what a person is experiencing or dealing with, let's stop pretending that we do!

Another one

My day started out magnificently, some puppy love as always and some tai chi with my friend. The remainder of the challenged me to remain calm and deal with things as they came along. I am so glad that I started my day with a solid foundation so that I wouldn't be overwhelmed with the challenges. It was a friendly reminder to get up and do your stuff cause you never know what the day will bring.

journalling

Doing it right now while I think of it and our meeting today! It was great to meet all the people that will be on next year's team, you all are in for an experience of a life time. Being part of the team has changed how I live my life, from fitness to hobbies to work, I take on everything in a manner that insures success.

Running and Friends

A couple of weeks ago, I had an opportunity to go for a run with a really good friend of mine. We have trained together before so it was a lot like putting on your favorite sweatshirt that makes you feel warm and cozy. We accept each other for where we are at, push each other when needed and take a little break when we have to. I wish everyone could have a training partner like that, someone that ever, ever judges you, just gives you a little push when you need it and celebrates the victories with you and picks you up when you fall down. I carried that warm in me for a week afterwards, thank you partner :)
So my team, if you ever want to go bike riding or running (inside of course) and would like someone to just be with you, I'm your man (well not literally but it seemed weird to say woman!). I also go swimming but that is less likely to be something that you can do with a partner. I go to the TriLeisure most mornings, sometimes at five or six and sometimes a bit later like seven or eight (if I am not on day shift) and I invite all of you to speak up and say Hey, can I come? It doesn't matter what your fitness level or skills are, I don't care, if you only have 1/2 an hour that's okay too!  Of course, there is always time for a few forms afterwards :)
I am looking forward to hearing from you all :)

Living the Life

I started this knitting project in January to help Katie raise money for a trip to Africa, that trip is a no go but I have continued with the project to raise money for the Silent River Benevolent Foundation. I have been making and selling the same thing for all of this calendar year, dish clothes and oven mitts. I have taken a few side trips to make a baby blanket or two but I have continued on with this project through thick and thin for nearly 11 months now. Last night, it occurred to me that it is very much like the I Ho Chuan, always working towards the end goal with a few side trips here and there. Those side trips may include injuries, lack of motivation, or just lack of participation but they are the same and we always come back to working on the goals again. I have learned much more than I have given myself credit for by being a part of so many I Ho Chuan teams, I am living the life and I wasn't even trying that hard!
So much like the I Ho Chuan year, the end of my project is in sight and I don't intend to ever quit knitting (or kung fu) but I will do something slightly different in the coming year.

Where am I? What am I doing?

Well, I am not at kung fu! I am working out, doing a bit of Tai Chi, trying to spend a bit of time with my friends and working my butt off trying to look after everything in my world. Right now I don't know how to fit everything in, so I am doing the best I can with the tools that I have. I am making sure that I have time for a work out each day and sometimes it includes my forms ( I would be lying if I said that I was practicing daily), I know that I need that in order to survive. It is one of the most important things that I do for myself to stay focused, calm and relaxed. Another thing that I do for myself is hang out at the kwoon with like-minded people, I am not able to do that as much as I want to right now. It will come back, I know it.
In the meantime, my little babies are growing like bad weeds, running into every situation that presents itself and loving everyone in their path. One of them has to go to their new forever home on Tuesday and I am not really looking forward to that but one of them gets to stay with us for an extra two weeks so that is really cool.
I think that I always remember how much work is involved in having a litter of puppies grace my home, and then it happens and I am overwhelmed by the work. I am sure in a few weeks I will forget the work and be ready to take on more puppies next time as I will recall only the kisses and the cuddles :)

Keeping on

 I continue to fight my way back into a routine of sorts. I have a couple of good days and then a couple of not so good. I crave the consistency that I had created and long to have it back. I must remind myself how difficult and challenging it was to set up in the first place, so much so that I started working on it a month before I wanted to start it. So I must be patient with myself and remember that if this was easy, everyone would do it.
I have no idea what to blog about today. Every time that I blog lately, I write this line first and then I continue on and write. I am not sure why it helps but it does. It's like once I get it out of my mind and onto the page, it no longer plagues me and I can move on. The mind is a wonderful place to play. :)

Happy Thanksgiving

First of all, I totally thought that I wrote my blog last night....I had my computer open and everything...I'm not really sure what happened. I had a really weird day, I felt weird and shaky all day long, so much so that I didn't want to drive. So I had to miss my favorite class, one that I haven't been able to go to for what feels like a really long time. I am not sure what causes it or how to make it go away, it usually goes away in a day or two.
Today we celebrated Thanksgiving because of my work schedule. We talked about what we are thankful for and my number one is Jim and Katie. I am also thankful for my amazing work team, my kung fu friends, God, my career, the opportunities that I have had to grow into the person that I am, my amazing pet family, my brother and his wife and my friends. I feel very lucky 99% of the time and that is pretty cool.
ps
Ms. Gibbons I hope that meets your challenge :)

House work and puppies

I had a great day doing my housework thing and re-organizing in order to make room for the puppies. They are getting their legs under them and are just about ready to wreak havoc in my home. We will create an area where they can run around and not get in so much trouble. It will mean that our kitchen table will live in our living room for a little while and it will make doing my form in the living room very entertaining but they will only be here for six more weeks so I think that I will be okay :)
I love that we, the team, are using the google plus more, it is fun to keep in touch with everyone all the time. I like the idea for snow shoveling this year, I think that it will be a lot easier to assign times then match people and their schedules up. I am looking forward to going to class tomorrow and maybe doing a little lion dancing!!!!

Last week

Today

Need sleep

Trying to blog more!!!!
I did not have a great sleep last night and it totally affected my morning routine, making me foggy-headed and forgetful. I am hoping to have a better sleep today and a much better day tomorrow. I know that I sleep better when I work out on a regular basis and when I don't work out, then have a crappy sleep and then don't work out....etc. I had a busy work day and a busy evening so hopefully my sleep will be easy tonight:)

Routine

My blogging goal this year is to blog every day, I have failed to do this! It was the first thing to go when I started to have trouble with my requirements and commitment, hind sight being 20-20. A part of me wants to give up on the blogging all together because I've already failed but I know if I do that then the rest of the requirements will stop as well. So I am going to keep trying and figure out how to get back on the everyday train.
I was so surprised yesterday when I got out my yoga mat and got down to my sit up and kicks how at home that I felt. I expected the movements to feel foreign and awkward but it really felt like coming home. I forget sometimes that I had a routine set since January and that it has been a good chunk of the year that I was doing that everyday and a small chunk of the year that I was lost and not doing my daily routine. In the moment, it feels like the down part was the bigger part, hmmm interesting! It feels so good to have that back, I got up again this morning and pulled out my mat and did my sit ups and kicks and yoga before starting my day (the cat doesn't like this routine, he prefers to eat first and blames the yoga mat!). I don't think that will have a problem sticking with the routine, I like it too much and it feels wrong not to do it. I think this is how you make a lifestyle change that sticks!

My week!

 

Sunday was an interesting day, my little girl dog Sadie began her labor to give birth to these beauties. Normally this is a long impatient process, in this case, a little longer. I am Sadie's person, she likes me to be with her, especially when she doesn't exactly know what is going on. So I stayed with her throughout her process and it was much longer than any of us expected. On Tuesday morning, Sadie had an emergency C-section and gave birth to 2 girls and 2 boys, it was amazing (I was there the whole time) to help these little guys take their first breath, watch my daughter see the whole process and support my nervous Sadie through the whole thing. Sadie needed a lot of support over the next couple of days as she dealt with being a new mom and recovery from her surgery and today I am happy to report that she seems like her old self with some new fun qualities. The babies are growing like weeds and getting cuter by the minute and the rest of my pet family is getting used to the weird noises they make and their unique smell. We are a happy, tired group as we try to manage our added chores with the rest of our responsibilities. I look forward to the love and growth that will happen in our household over the next couple of months. :)

get up and go....left!

What is up with me? Well, I'm sure you figured something was coming since I haven't blogged in two weeks! I'm having a hard time getting anything done, with each plan I make comes many excuses and reasons why it won't work out. I seem to have a million of them . I'm sure that part of the problem is that I have not been at the kwoon much in the last little while and that is definitely my grounding place. It seems like each time a make a conscious decision not to attend a class, then life completely gets in the way for a few weeks after that. This week I am working Wed - Fri evening and then Sat and Sun during the day. Missing many of my favorite days of classes. It seems like being sick a week ago zapped all my get up and go, I'm still really tired and I am having trouble staying awake through parts of the day. I'm trying to eat really healthy and keep my energy up and that seems to be keeping me barely hanging on.
I am thinking of the things that I should be doing, could be doing and then coming up with reasons/excuses why I won't. I have really struggled throughout this whole year to keep my spirits up, to complete my commitments, to stay engaged....it suddenly seems way to hard for me.
I suppose that it would be good if I had this all figured out and was now presenting a solution but I don't have one.

Fall has arrived.....

It seems like summer is over. I went back to work on the 19th of August and we have not had decent summer weather since. We have had beautiful fall weather - there is a smell in the air that is fresh and cold and promises of long nights snuggled under the blankets with a good book. I don't mind fall, in fact, I kind of like it, it is my reset time. I don't like that it means that winter is on its way. I am not a big fan of winter, unless I am participating in winter sports. I don't like to have to do stuff when it is too cold and snowy to be outside. When I was young, I lived in northern Sask., and it was very cold in the winter. When it was super cold, we stayed indoors and did fun stuff. When it wasn't minus 40, we played outside - skiing, tobogganing, building snow forts, you get the idea. So I guess that is how I would like winter to still be - stay in when it is cold and play when it is not. Where do you think that I can sign up for that?
In order to pass the winter without getting too cranky, I am going to train for a triathlon in the spring. At the end of May actually. I am super excited, my brother has completed one IronMan and a few triathlons and is going to help me create a training plan. I am looking forward to spending more time with my brother and getting better at swimming, biking and running.

It's a new day!!!!

I'm pretty excited to get back to classes this week, I had some personal things and work get in the way a few weeks before renos so it seems like I haven't been around for a while. Maybe it is the school girl in me but this time of year always seems like a fresh start. I am not sure what this school year will bring for me but I am planning on making it spectacular. I may have an opportunity to take some new state of the art training for my career, I will definitely take part in a training plan in order to participate in an event next summer and I will continue to move forward in this journey with my family, bonding and growing stronger together each day. I love being on the I Ho Chuan team and feeling that push each day to be better and try new things, it has definitely encouraged me to take steps outside my comfort zone which has created some new opportunities.

something is going on!

being rested is a magical thing. i have just finished my first set of days off since being on holidays and i am very pleased with how it went. i did not have a busy first week at work and did not really wear me out (health issues not withstanding) and therefore my days off were pretty good. i kept busy for the entire three days and not in a crazy got to get things done sort of way, just kept moving forward and i am rewarded with many completed tasks; getting katie ready for school, spending family time out to celebrate a birthday (happy birthday mom) and katie and i worked together yesterday and got some house work done. now, there are many things that still need to be accomplished ( and there always will be), but the way i feel right now, there is no doubt in my mind that it will all get done :)
fun story - this morning, red discovered that if he stood in just the right spot he could get a kiss each time i sat up, it was pretty cute. he wagged his tail the whole time, i'm sure that he thought my sole purpose was to play with him.
so the next time you are wondering why do we do the same thing over and over again, what is this incremental progress all about, have a look at your everyday habits and see if there is a difference. in the olden days (before i ho chuan) i would have looked at my list of things to do and been completely overwhelmed by it. now, i just do one thing at a time and then move on to the next. another funny thing, on my day off, i just didn't have the get up and go that i had on the other days, hmmmm.....there just might be something to this madness

this and that

What a busy week! I love/hate going back to work each and every time. I like going back because I have a great career and I love what I do. I don't like going back because I have to adjust my schedule from doing whatever I want whenever I want to not. :) I always begin the first week with the notion that I can still do many things before going to work on an afternoon shift and stay up late and take care of household tasks when I am on day shift. That is not the case ever! Well, maybe occasionally, which always makes me think it can be done more often. So I am over tired, a little sick and completely overwhelmed by the number of things that I would like to accomplish in the next few days. I will do the best I can with the tools I have. :)
I am looking forward to helping with the renos this year, I like that we are concentrating on cleaning and polishing the place up 'cause these are things that I know how to do. Tiling and tearing down walls.... not so much. I hope that we have lots of people come and help out, I always enjoy chatting with people outside of class and finding out a bit more about them.
It was challenging once again to go to work and complete my requirements but it also felt really good to have a routine again. Over the summer, I worked out at many different times of day and I liked it but it felt kind of willy-nilly. I like doing the same thing at the same time (sort of) every day. When I am working, the first thing that I do each day is kicks, sit ups, tai chi and weights and then I fit in my forms throughout the day. My first thing ranges from 4:45 to 7 or 8, depending on my shift but I am consistently doing it first thing. I feel a lot like I am making progress again and felt a bit stagnant over the summer.
Wondering why I am talking about summer like it is over? Well, it feels sort of over to me. I have a difficult time breathing when the air changes from warm and cozy (33) to chilly (7) over night. I have spent the weekend trying to look after myself, resting, and taking my homeopathic remedies because of the chilly air. I usually don't experience this until Sept. or Oct. so it seems early but it seems over.
Black belt class on Friday night was amazing, we are learning some new concepts to apply to the moves that we already know. I don't really know how to put it into words but there were many ah-ha moments and puzzles unraveling. I am looking forward to exploring these concepts more as I do my forms and techniques.

technology

I have not been able to blog for the last two days because my computer would not load the necessary sites/pages (I'm not really sure what to call them). I have no idea what was wrong but I know that my husband fixed it and for many hours (while I slept) my computer had a black screen with white words on it. Now it works just fine!
I have been trying to update my photo and it isn't as easy as it looks. I finally changed my flavors page and I thought that I changed my google picture but as I look in the corner by my name, I see the old picture. I am determined to figure this out and I can understand how and why others get frustrated with different systems. I like how I feel when I figure something out and know how to do it so for that reason alone, I will persevere.
Today was sort of like a day off but it is also the same day that I meet my buddy to go through the Tai Chi form. We did the whole thing three times today and it is starting to feel pretty good. I also worked on my Tai Chi Broad Sword and I think I got a glimpse of the light at the end of the tunnel.

More complicated than I thought

I bought a new vehicle today! What does that have to do with my kung fu? Well, it kept me from classes and an instructor's meeting. I can't believe how long it took, choosing colors, talking prices, then when all that is done then you have to sit down with the financial guy and talk about warranties and protection. It was hours longer than I thought it would be because we thought we knew exactly what we wanted when we went there. In case you are thinking, who doesn't know this, me! I haven't purchased a new vehicle in over 25 years.
I did managed to do my requirements and go for an extra long walk with my puppy after a late supper. I am determined to keep packing on the extra miles before I go back to work next week.

My Muscles :)

I have put a few miles in since I last blogged. I even took my dog out last night even though it was still too hot for him. He did pretty good until the end when he just wanted to stop and lay in the grass. That was all well and good for him but I managed to lose a house key in the process. I looked last for a  while and then retraced my steps in the light of day this morning, I did not find it but put in a few miles trying. That will make up for the days when I didn't walk him far or not at all.
The key situation resolved itself with some anxious moments (or hours) and some kind heartedness. Thank you again for helping me out :)
I lifted weights this morning and I could really feel my muscles working today. I don't lift big weights (10lbs.) but I do different exercises to strength all the muscles in my arms and shoulders. I used to have to really concentrate to use the muscles that I wanted and now it takes less effort. My hard work is paying off.
I did 300 sit ups too and I really pushed myself to increase my reps and I liked it.
I am trying to mindfully do my daily routine and focus on the muscle groups and not just do them to get them done. I also want to slow down and build the smaller muscles too!

Chatting

I'm still not really comfortable with the changes that I have made to my form but I can see that it will improve and be amazing when I have more reps in. I am at that 'is it ever going to change?' point and can't wait to get past it.
I have not been getting in as many miles as I would like or thought that I would during my time off. I have been creating moments like parking far away from my destination but I know that what I really need is some time on the trails. It is not easy when it is too hot for the dogs, I really count on them to get me out the door.
Acts of Kindness are a work in progress, some days opportunities seem to come out of the wood work and other days I feel like I have to go searching for ways to be kind. I am feeding my friend's cats while they are away which I count daily as an act of kindness. Yesterday, I wanted to count it times ten as one of the cats seemed to have disappeared when I went to feed them. Many crazy thoughts went through my head as I contemplated how he could have gotten out, where he could be hiding, it was fifteen minutes of panic and anxiety. And then I found him, sitting on a chair tucked in under the table, he seemed to look at me like he didn't really care how worried I was. Some days acts of kindness are not so easy.

Win Win

Today I went outside my comfort zone and did something that I convinced myself that I would fail at. I was anxious and unsure of myself but I had decided to do something and I was going to do it. I did not fail, I was not sure until the very end how it would end so it was a bit of a stressful day. Before kung fu, I would have created an excuse to not go, I would have set up excuses to fail that were not my fault or I would have found a reason to leave so that I could escape the uncomfortable feeling. Now, I accepted that I was feeling uncomfortable and why, not only did I not want to fail, I didn't want anyone to know that I failed. Once I accepted that, I settled down, got to work, paid attention and was successful. Now I'm really tired and glad the day is over and kind of proud of myself for sticking to it.

HUGS

Highlight of the day.....
A little girl who recently joined kung fu in the lil leopards class, ran up to me after class and gave me the most heart-felt hug. That is what this is all about!

More learning

I am feeling slightly less over whelmed while in the lion's head. At first, there are so many things to think of, it feels nearly impossible. Of course, that does not get in my way. I am slowly getting more comfortable with the moves and the head (having a great lion and a great partner also helps!) and today I think that I may have actually been able to follow direction. It is a very different but completely cool to be in the lion head. I usually use the mirror to see if I am doing something right or wrong and in the lion, you have to totally rely on how it feels. This is something that I use to fix a trouble spot in my forms so....I think that you have some chance of success when you can mix how you feel with looking amazing and telling a story.

Not physical goals

My fund raising/knitting project is finally looking like it may succeed. I have a pile of finished orders to deliver and a few more to make. I have callouses from knitting ( I never thought that would happen!) and I have used this project to spend quality time with my family. There is nothing like a great big knotted ball that takes more than one person and long stretches of time to undo to create the perfect time for chit chat. I also rewind my balls of yarn so that is another great way to get the hands busy and the mouth wandering. I also knit while we watch movies, so with more knitting to get done, more movies get watched together.
I wanted to make a goal this year to spend more time with my family and I wasn't really sure how to do it. I decided that I would stay aware of how my absence and presences affects the daily life of my family and act accordingly. I am more aware of what they need and what I need in order for us to live happily together, it is a fine balance and I am getting better at it each day.

Learning

Learning to play the guitar is much like learning a new form. This is not the first time that I have had this thought but I was reminded again today while at my lesson. I was working on a particular transition and having a bit of difficulty getting it and I thought, I need to go home and practice this repeatedly and it will become easier. I know this because there comes a point with every form that I practice when I know that the only thing that is going to make a difference is time in. This happens especially after learning a new move or correcting a move that I have been doing for a while.
A few years back, after I had learned all the moves in Kempo, it didn't feel right and I didn't know why. I spoke to Sifu Brinker about it and he suggested that I break it down, do a bunch of reps and see if I could figure it out. Well, at first I didn't notice anything and kept going back to him and he challenged me to look at different ways that I was moving and try different things. I continued to repeat the form until I was familiar with it at a level that I didn't think was possible, it felt like I owned the form and I knew how to move in it. I began to figure things out on my own  and discovered that I was adding movements that didn't need to be there and skipping ones that did. I learned to figure out how it felt to move correctly and how it felt when I wasn't. That was a turning point for my martial arts training, once I now how something feels, I am well on my way to figuring it out.
I am hoping with a lot of repetition I will be able to figure out this chord transition too!

Leadership is.....

Leadership is getting people to do what you are doing 'cause it looks cool, the results are amazing, you make it look easy, and many many more reasons. As a leader your job is to inspire others to be like you - whether it is doing push ups to get in shape or taking on a project in the community - they are following because you inspired them.
The I Ho Chuan program is all about leadership, demonstrating good leadership skills, getting others involved in what you are doing, and getting others to want to do what you are doing. That is our job! We need to work hard, train out loud, and document our journey so that others may follow. It doesn't mean that we have to lead every project and have all the great ideas, we just need to be there to encourage and cheer for everyone who wants to step up.
Leadership is.....inspiration!

Red's journey

Some days, I am not really sure whose journey this is. Today is one of those days! Red (1year old boxer puppy, in case you forgot!!!) got me up nice and early so that he could have a nice breakfast and of course, go for a pee. I may benefit from the early call by getting more things done during the day but that is not the focus of this blog. Red helped me get more steps than usual in my being indecisive about whether or not he wanted outside, wanted to stay outside or wanted me to stay with him outside. Red helped me with the barbequing, we may or may not have learned that the bbq is hot, and I got to practice my ninja skills when he tried to help me carry the plate of chicken with his mouth. (For the record, I did not drop the plate or the chicken, maybe a little chicken juice dribbled!) He loves the cane and seems to think that he should have it because carrying it around is fun. (he encourages me to move faster). Red also helped with my crane stance this evening, his foot chewing distracted me from looking at the timer too much. And last but not least, he helped me relax by flopping beside me and dropping his head on my mid section, it is difficult to do anything but chill out when the 80 lb baby needs a snuggle.
ps he helps with other things like painting my toe nails which is less kung fu related except when you are color matching with your lion :)

Keeping on!

I'm doing lot's of procrastinating, not just about kung fu but other things around the house. I think that I may have too much time on my hands so I am not doing too much of anything. If I have a plan or an appointment, that seems to help my schedule and I get more things done. Otherwise, I am just hanging out, visiting with Jim and Katie, playing with my dogs and my unpredictable cat. I am getting lots done on my knitting projects, I did cane strikes in my back alley this evening and I am eating well. I had hoped to do some painting this week but it is too hot for that (hopefully it won't be as hot on Monday). I will keep keeping on!

Boot Camp

First of all I must say that I am not going to count my vacation days anymore, there may be some negative responses due to there being so many of them. So, I am on vacation until I am not.
Boot Camp.....
What a great day!
As I was driving out to Keephills, I started to relax as soon as I got off the highway and things started to slow down (except the crazy driver but he was going so fast that he wasn't in my world for long !)
Walking meditation was fabulous once I accepted that there was no talking! Every time I saw something cool, I wanted to share with my friends, it's what I do! The walk was very calming and relaxing, I endeavor to do more walking meditation (not just warp speed walking).
Moving meditation was also grand. I love all movement that involves my chi and sharing that passion with others is a rush.
I left to go and help with the lil leopards class and that was fun, helping them figure out relay racing is always very entertaining :)
Being a black belt at boot camp is so cool, not only do you get to participate but you get to hang out with a bunch of cool black belt and students that take this journey on in a similar manner to you. It is inspiring to watch the students push themselves to their limits, have a rest and push themselves some more. It is also cool to continue to learn more about the art and myself each time I attend.
There was much story telling ( I love it!) and lot's of laughs (not just at me!!!) and tons of bonding, it was an amazing day!

Tired, nervous and excited

Today was a busy day - getting ready for boot camp, preparing food, doing laundry, sewing my badges on my new uniform (!!!!)
I am a little nervous about running a seminar tomorrow but mostly excited. And I'm excited about boot camp. I love hanging out with like-minded people all day long, everyone pushing themselves as hard as they can. It will be a great day! Rain or shine!!!!

Day 13 - vacation

I slept in again today, just when I think that I am rested, I sleep some more! I enjoyed my guitar lesson today, a learned a new part of a song that I have been working on (it is sort of like being ready to learn the next part of a form). I had an opportunity to help a friend and attend the advanced Black Dragon class, it was a lot of fun. There were not many students but the ones that were there worked hard and clearly pushed themselves outside of their comfort zone with some gentle guidance from Sifu Playter. I am glad that I attended that class today.
Here's what I did today:
5 miles
200 sit ups
200 kicks
practiced my guitar
Acts of Kindness
- advised a lady in the park on how to keep the numerous mosquitoes off her dog
- let a lady go in front of me
- let someone cross the street in front of my vehicle
- took my dog for a nice long walk and now he is sleeping (and snoring) at my feet

Day 11 - vacation

Today I did not do any requirements, the only thing that I did that was kung fu ish was to drop the clean towels off after supper. I shopped with my daughter all afternoon looking for the ever elusive perfect pair of shorts ( for her not me!), had a nap and dinner with my family. After supper we did some things around the house and that is the whole day. Of course, my activities were interspersed with reading my book and playing my guitar.
Acts of Kindness
- had a great chat with a lady in the line up for the til
- let Katie drive for part of the afternoon
- spent some time with a really good book

Day 10 - vacation

Today was my day off but it doesn't usually work out that way and today was no different. I met my friend and did Tai Chi for an hour. Of course, there was some visiting too! It is so cool to do Tai Chi with another person, especially one that you are comfortable with. It is relaxing and exhilarating all at the same time. You both get your chi flowing and it feels very powerful, the time goes by super fast and you don't even have to think about the movements, you just move. It was a great way to spend some time on a Sunday. This is the second weekend in a row that I have hung out at the kwoon on a Sunday morning, it is starting to feel like a habit :)
Here's what I did today:
- 2 reps of the entire Tai Chi form and some fooling around with some trouble spots
- 3 miles
Acts of Kindness
- helped a lady at a store whose bag broke
- moved out of the way for someone who was clearly in a hurry
- said good bye to our trailer at last, I did this all by myself, met the people, showed the trailer, collected the money, and opened the storage place today so they could pick it up. We have been talking about selling our trailer for a while so I am glad that I was able to do something about it.

Day 9 - vacation

I love Saturdays, it is by far my favorite day of the week. I remember when I was a kid, I looked forward to Saturday every week. Now I am a taller kid, I still do the same thing but for slightly different reasons. Now it is all about kung fu! I totally enjoy spending 5 hours of my day at the kwoon,  each and every week that I can. And it still gives me enough of my day left to do other things, hang out with my family, take care of  my yard or do a few chores or errands. It is the perfect day each week! I am completely looking forward to next Saturday already :)
Here's what I did:
300 kicks
150 sit ups
15 Da Ma Hsing
12 Tai Chi Broad Sword
4 miles
Acts of Kindness
-  worked with my husband to find a home for all of our camping equipment
- chatted with lovely people in the health food store
- asked for help when my hands were full
- helped with the fitness class and consequently worked my butt off :)

Day 7 - vacation

Last night I slept for 10 hours, that is something that I usually only do when I am sick. I felt really rested when I got up but a little off my game. I usually get up between 7 and 8 each morning and today I got up shortly after 11! None of my pets woke me for their breakfast but they certainly let me know that they had waited long enough when we finally started our day together. I decided to follow my routine to the best of my ability so I could get back on track.
I had a great day, spent some time with Katie and Jim, attended my kid's classes and had dinner with my family. The kid's class was amazing, I started out doing the warm up and had a great plan for a fun class. I ended up going from the warm up to stances to a spontaneous relay to the end the class. It was totally fun and it seems like the kids were having a good time too. They worked really hard on their kicks and stances and smiled the whole time. That in my mind is a successful class :)
Here's what I did:
100 sit ups
100 kick
3 miles
Acts of Kindness
- took Katie driving for 90 minutes (that is not easy! and it should count as ten acts of kindness)
- made lunch for Jim
- shared friendliness with an elderly gentleman at the grocery store

Day 6 - vacation

This morning when I did my workout, it seems like all I did was tighten up all the muscles. I lifted weights today and throughout my workout my neck and shoulders got tighter and tighter. Any of  you experienced lifters have any thoughts on this? I started lifting 2 lb weights at the beginning of the I Ho Chuan year to strengthen my shoulders for push ups and I continue to lift every other day and I am up to 10 lb weights doing 3 reps of 12. Today was the first day that I have experienced this muscle tightening thing.
What I did:
300 sit ups
180 kicks
weights
tai chi
practiced my guitar
3 miles
Acts of Kindness
- chatted with another guitar student's mom
- helped my husband with his sore leg
- gathered some information for my husband

Day 5 - vacation

Yesterday's rest was just what the doctor ordered! I feel great today, I have my energy back and accomplished many more things than I expected. I did my requirements and did some yard work before it got too hot. I also attended the kid's classes and was surprised and impressed by the number of dedicated students and how hard they worked despite the heat.
today i did:
150 sit ups
150 kicks
4 miles
tai chi
tai chi broad sword
mu long koon
practiced my guitar
blogged
Acts of Kindness
- finished an oven mitt in time for a birthday :)
- let someone in front of me at the feeds store
- let someone in traffic
- friendly to folks who stopped their car so I could cross the street
-  a waved to a guy who let me onto the road when I couldn't very well

Day 4 - vacation

Today was all about looking after me. I had tea and read with my pet family laying on me. I watched movies with my husband. I ate all my favorite comfort foods. I knitted a lot. I had a nap. And I feel rejuvenated. I needed a day like today :)

Day 3 - vacation

I may be starting to slow down a bit. I declared today a rest day! and then forgot and started doing sit ups. I finally got to begin to pay back for all the help that I received from everyone when I was getting ready to grade. Today I opened the kwoon for someone to practice the fitness test, the year before I tested, several different black belts opened the kwoon so that we could practice the test. It is important to me that I get to return the favor to other people getting ready to grade.
Today I did:
50 sit ups
Acts of Kindness
- opened up the kwoon today
- chatted with two super nice people at Superstore
- made supper this morning so I wouldn't heat up the house
- made lunch for my husband

Day 2 - vacation

I am extremely tired, in a can't get enough rest kind of way. I managed to attend all my classes at kung fu today and pushed through open training until 1:30. When I came home, I went out again to help my husband with some stuff and then totally crashed on the couch when we returned home again. I don't want to stop everything and rest, I am hoping to do my requirements and meet my commitments and rest. I had a great time at the kwoon today, I learned more about how to move with my tai chi move (since finding my hips, it is a whole new world), worked super hard in the fitness class but it didn't feel like hard work (probably 'cause my partner was there and it was fun) and discovered some amazing moves for my tai chi broad sword thanks to Sifu Playter. Good day at the kwoon!
Here is what I did:
300 sit ups
200 kicks
6 tai chi broad sword
3 miles
tai chi
blog (obviously)
practiced my guitar
Acts of Kindness
- friendly to people at Safeway
- let car in traffic
- helped Mr. Smid with wrist escapes
- waved at my neighbors
- helped my husband

Day 1 - vacation

Today was a good day! My first day of holidays and I slept until almost 6 am! I truly enjoyed my workout this morning, I really concentrated on my movements, ensuring that I had good position. I slowed down my kicks in an attempt to work a different muscle group and my legs are a little sore so it may be something to incorporate more often. I didn't go for a walk this morning as I had some appointments so I had to chose between walking and work out.
What I did:
300 sit ups
200 kicks
tai chi
3 tai chi broad sword
3 lau gar
2 kempo
guitar practice
lion dancing
I am still trying to feel what is right for my tai chi sword, hopefully I can finish with that this weekend and get to practicing it over and over and over. I loved being in the lion, it is fun, hard, sweaty and a little bit scarey ('cause you don't really know where you are). I hope that I can practice again tomorrow.

Today

I am not really sure that I was totally awake when I threw my first kick this morning but it was a fun way to wake up. My cat helped me with my sit ups by sitting on my tummy and giving me kisses or at least trying to :) I think that we should write a book (as a group) titled 'how I survived I Ho Chuan with the help of my pet family'. We have a lot of great stories that we make some people smile (well, me anyways).
What I did:
150 sit ups
180 kicks
tai chi
mu long koon
tai chi broad sword (without the sword)
practiced my guitar and went to my lesson
3 miles ( no dog walk due to working at the crack of dawn)
Acts of Kindness
I slowed down and let someone in traffic
made dinner even though I wanted to put my head down and sleep
sent Katie an advertisement for a writing contest that she may be interested in
gave my husband a small present that he really liked
read and responded to as many blogs as I could

My Day

It is a pretty good time at the children's classes when the numbers are low due to the beautiful weather and vacations. We can concentrate on specific things with specific kids and really get some great work done. In one class today, we did noodle sword fighting and were able to concentrate on combinations and blocking and countering. Something we can't always do when the class is full and we have to concentrate on making sure everyone has a turn. In the beginners class we worked a lot on kicks and were able to spend some serious one to one time with our students and really help them in the areas that they were struggling in. It was a good kung fu day :)

I did:
300 sit ups
230 kicks
weights
tai chi
6 miles
no reps today - I had a little trouble with my vehicle and fixing it took my forms time
Acts of Kindness
let a lady go in front of me in line at the grocery store
let someone in traffic when I saw their non-verbal need for my lane (I learned that at the meeting on Saturday)
checked in with a couple of friends to see if they are okay
congratulated someone on their new position

getting their money's worth

 Work has been brutal the last couple of days, I guess that is the price I pay for a lengthy holiday. I will enjoy my time with my family and my time at the kwoon while I am off and recharge my work person for another six months of intensity.
On days like today I am very glad that I have my routine and structure of my daily workouts. I guarantee that tomorrow's will not be very  early in the morning, perhaps a little closer to mid-morning :)

Forms

I worked on my Tai Chi Broad Sword this evening, trying to modify it so that I don't hurt my shoulder each time. I have two different versions that may work but I am not really sure what the finished produce will look like. I think that I am going to video them and decide which one to keep and which one to toss or maybe even a combination of the two. I got a little frustrated and sore so I switched to Tai Chi and settled myself down. It was a good day at the kwoon today.

Acts of Kindness

Our wonderful team decided that we would do random acts of kindness for each other. We chose names, and are to do unanimous acts of kindness for that person throughout the year. Today I received one such act! What a great surprise! Thank you kind person, Katie and I had a great evening together and are planning what we can do together next week. You definitely made my day better.
My kind acts for the day;
1. Stopped to let an elderly lady cross the street
2. Held open the door for an elderly lady with a cane at the library
3. Helped someone at the grocery store
4. Shared my happiness and made people smile at the movie theater
5. Chatted with a man and his dog at the park
6. I said good morning to everyone I saw on my walk this morning
 
An act of kindness in defined by the recipient, when I make people smile, I think - I was just kind to that person.

One person....

What happens when one person works against the grain of all the other people on the team? They talk a good talk but in reality they are doing whatever they want when no one is looking. They seem to get along well with everyone, laugh and joke and fool around but definitely have their own agenda. What can be done?
I am not talking about our team at kung fu, I am talking about my work team. I seriously don't know what to do, each new initiative is put in place with safe guards so this person doesn't sabotage it. So far we have talked and talked, involved the management team and are very blunt when discussing how we would like things to be run. This person keeps on smiling and nodding and agreeing with everything and then does not stick to the plan. I guess you can really only lead a horse to water, you can't make them drink.

Canada'a Birthday

Being around a group of people who have made great sacrifices and commitment to be a part of our country was a very humbling experience today. I love that I am a Canadian and I am very proud of our country and I am glad that we make room for folks from other countries to come here and prosper. I had never been to a citizenship ceremony before and I am likely to attend more in the future, it was an awe-inspiring event.
Hanging out with the Horse team today was also very humbling. It is easy to forget that there is a whole group of people working just as hard as you are to be amazing until you spend several hours together and then it becomes glaringly apparent that you are not alone and some surprising people share some of the same struggles.  What a great day!
I know that many of us set out to do 1000 push ups (kicks) and sit ups, I didn't make it. I had some stuff to do after we were done at the park and I totally lost my momentum. The rest of the day seemed to entail recovering from the lengthy time spent outside. I will definitely be more focused tomorrow :)
We didn't quite make it to the fireworks, Katie is taking a summer school course and needed to do some school work in order to stay on her schedule. That young lady has more discipline that anyone else I have ever met, she is determined that she is going to be successful and she works hard every day to ensure that it happens. I know that she will succeed at everything that she puts her mind to!

Half way

I think that this is a good year! I can feel my kung fu improving, my awareness increasing, my commitment deepening. I have really been struggling and still moving forward every day. I think that spells success. I have talked about quitting, thought about quitting and still have gotten up and completed my requirements each day. I have had such thoughts and feelings before and it has definitely affected my performance. This year, I am continuing to move forward each day, that is the difference. I have shared my struggles more than before so that is also different, I used to suffer in silent and then talk about it after and share my learning. I think that I am growing and learning each day that I get up and improve my quality of life. I see many people on the team doing the same thing, perhaps not exactly what people expected but getting better and better each day. Success!!!!!

Happy Birthday Canada!

I have hips!

Yesterday was one of the greatest Kung fu days that I have ever had! I have been feeling disconnected from my hips, most noticibly in Tai Chi. So I was working with Sifu Dennis yesterday and I'm not really sure how it happened, what exact question or direction to try  this or that but I figured it out. I can feel, am aware of, know what it means to line up my hips with my shoulders. It was wicked awesome!!! After I went to open training and worked on my weapon and hand forms and I still managed to harmonize my hips and shoulders, I am so excited that I can't stand it. I finally get it! I want to do my forms every minute of every day! Yeah me!

Best I can

I have made no secret of the fact that I am struggling with my requirements daily.....currently I have good days and bad days and you can usually tell by my blog. I completely forgot to blog last night, I was hanging out with my family, watching movies and having fun and I didn't even realize I forgot until this morning. I know that I just have to it done, but some days, it is just not possible. Does that make me not engaged? I don't think so, I am just doing the best I can with the tools that I have.

Food, demo and kids :)

Today I managed to convince a group of small, hot and sweaty young people that we could practice kung fu, no matter what! It was challenging to face a group of kids that looked like they had absolutely no energy left for the day, but we did it together. We pushed ourselves, did some awesome techniques and combinations and felt good about it in the end.
I went to the demo practice tonight and had a good time fooling around with our forms and figuring out how to put them together in a demo. I also had an opportunity to work a little bit with a couple of sihings on their board breaking techniques, I kinda had a flash back to my board breaking experience.
Today I seem to have my old energy back, not exactly sure what I have done differently, I have made some food changes a few months ago and have adjusted that some more this week so all together, I think that I may be on to something. Healthy portion control, balanced food groups and don't cut down on anything if you are working out everyday!

Today

I feel like I am catching a cold, sore throat, aches, tired, small headache, etc.... I have been sleeping, like going to be super early, and trying to take care of myself. I am eating lots of fruit and veggies, taking my vitamins and trying not to over-extend. Hopefully, this will do the trick!
I got to spend the morning with Katie today, something we haven't been able to do in a while, and we had a good time. I love when she doesn't have to go to school and is available for hanging out during the day :)
I have been struggling with my meditation for many years but I have recently discovered that by doing tai chi everyday and walking early in the morning when no one else is around, it is a form of moving meditation. It is really helping me stay grounded and able to relax my brain a little bit. I am hoping as we cruise into summer that I will get to spend more time at the kwoon but for right now, it is what it is!

first day of summer

Aboriginal Days

today i spent the day with my work kids at our annual aboriginal days celebration. we had a great time, it was nice to be outside all day, meeting new people, greeting ones we already knew. we spent some time talking to some of the elders and that was educational and entertaining. it was an action packed day for all of us. consequently i worked late, came home and promptly fell asleep = too late to attend classes. i am glad that i did my daily reps at 4:45 before my work day began or i would be trying to figure out how to fit it in and i just want to  go to bed :)

Lion Dancing

How do you even talk about lion dancing? How do you describe what it is like inside the head? Being a tail is quite extraordinary, you are alone but not, completely connected to the head! I love being inside the head, it is like you are following a set pattern but at the same time, totally doing your own thing. You move the head around in a way that feels right to you but follow the drum and the steps that you have been taught. Last Saturday, when we were practicing, there was a moment where I was totally one with the lion, moving to the beat of the drum, completely unaware of anyone or anything else. When it was over, I was not sure how much time had passed! What a cool feeling! I want to do that again and again.
I certainly hope I can talk some folks into lion dancing for a bit tomorrow night :)

Suicide Prevention

I taught my suicide prevention refresher workshop today and I must say, I'm a bit tired. I love teaching, facilitating, leading a group of people and I find that it takes a lot of energy. I believe it is especially important that we teach people to talk openly about thoughts of suicide and feelings of hopelessness and helplessness. For some reason, we have created a society that doesn't reach out to anyone when they are in trouble, don't share with anyone when they are down and believe that they can handle everything on their own. Well, some things are for sharing and getting help with and thinking about ending your life is one of them. There are many resources available if you don't have anyone in your life that you can talk to, hot lines, crisis, hospitals, all you have to do is ask. I realize that it is a really hard thing to talk about but it does actually feel better to get it out and talk about it. It is nothing to be ashamed of or embarrassed about, many, many people have considered suicide as an option during trying times in their lives. I believe that people don't necessarily want to die, they just want the pain that they are living with in the moment to go away. If we can help someone get past that moment then we can help them to live and not end their life. If you know someone who is down and out, ask them if they are ok and if they need someone to talk to. It doesn't have to be you, you can assist them in finding someone (like a professional). Many businesses offer opportunities to seek counseling, some health insurance policies cover the cost, if you need information, for yourself or anyone else, just ask.
What does this have to do with kung fu? I am very passionate about helping people who are feeling helpless and hopeless and that is a very big part of me. Kung fu has helped give me the confidence to talk in front of groups of people about something that I feel strongly about.

Work and forms

It is going to be a bit of different week this week, it only happens every nine weeks. I work Tues, Wed. and Thurs evening and then day shift on Fri, Sat and Sun. That means that I am lucky that I had an opportunity to help with the advanced black dragons today because the next class that I am available for is Friday evening and then that is it. I am looking forward to a busy work week and some nice walks with my puppy and with my work kids. I don't like being away from the kwoon so much but it can't be helped as my chosen profession keeps me away at times.
I am putting into practice some very valuable advice that I got for my hand form and my weapon form and it seems to be working. I think that I know what I am doing with my weapon form, or at least I can fix the obvious spots and hope that the rest will fall into place. I am working on not pushing my weapon into place but allowing it to go there based on my body movements. So I think that I know what I am doing but I am not really sure. I am working on not trying so hard and letting the movements speak for themselves, I am finding it hard to let go and just be. I will keep trying.

Moment in time

The feeling is totally back! All I had to do was get up and do it.....
Of course, when I was in the middle of my slump, I couldn't see the forest for the trees and didn't consider just getting up and getting stuff done. Today, it took no effort at all, I just did it. I'm curious about the human mind and how it works, how does one day make a difference? one conversation? one moment in time? It kind of makes you pay more attention to each moment 'cause it could be the one that changes everything.
I had a great day and didn't stop moving forward all day, it was nice to have that back. I did some work outside and inside, I spent some time with my husband, I spent some time with me, finished a book and practiced my guitar. My guitar lessons just had a moment, my teacher said something to me that stayed with me all week and it seems to be changing how I am approaching my practice; just keep strumming and the magic will happen. It seems to be working.
I also got some interesting advice about my form on the weekend, by trying so hard to make it flow, I'm ruining the flow. The weirdest part is that I totally get it. I have been struggling with my hand form forever, it feels like. It feels clunky and not flowy, so I asked my sifu and it has totally changed how I am approaching my practice. I think I know exactly how to fix it, it will take some time but I now know what to do.
I feel like I have been walking around in a grey fog for months and suddenly the lights have been turned on and everything makes sense. It was that moment yesterday that changed everything, I'm glad that I was paying attention. :)

Quitting? Who Me?

No quitting.The I Ho Chuan is a major commitment to yourself and to your team. Even though failure is a possibility, quitting is not an option. Remember, failure is only final if you stop trying. Pass or fail, you will evolve as a person by challenging the journey.
 
These words have been resonating in my brain for about a month now. I have vacillated between varying degrees of quitting, full on quit (who cares about the consequences) to finishing the year (poorly - on my own - no team). I totally could not get these thoughts where they belonged - in the trash! The other day, I was reminded that I may be suffering from cranal/rectal inversion, it was true I was. So I stopped wearing my butt as a hat and got back to the business of living my life. I was so busy trying to make a decision about what to do with my life, I forgot to put one foot in front of the other and move forward, no matter what. I was struggling to find reasons to stay on track, I am busy, I have a lot on my plate, I have stressors, I have no time. Sound familiar? Today, Sifu Brinker said something that made me think Yes! Exactly! You have the tools, use them!!!(it may not be those exact words, but it is what I heard) One of our teammates was talking about struggling and  I distinctly remember thinking I had very similar thoughts and lack of action, and that was quickly followed by, just get up and do it. Stop struggling, stop talking about how tough it is and do it, you can do it, you did it before, you can do it again. You had a good thing going, so do it again, nothing is in your way but yourself! 
So I am officially back on track, getting up everyday and taking steps towards being amazing.

I need my team

Hey Team,
I had a great weekend! That is saying alot since I was sick last night!!!! Even though I was on the bench, I felt like part of the team, I got to visit with some people that I wouldn't have been able to if I was on the matts. Today was more of the same, walking in the parade is a great opportunity to get to know your teammates better (okay so is trapping them in a vehicle for 40 minutes and peppering them with questions!) and lunch was a blast (good food is always better with good company!). The rain didn't dampen our spirits, we continued on in our happy place all the way home. Thank you team for hanging out with me this weekend, I needed it :)

My girl needs me!

Today I had to take my little girl dog to the vet, she had a growth on her paw that needed to be removed. I was a little anxious as we have not had the best of luck in the vet department. The guy is a friend of my brother and his vet, he is really down to earth and easy to talk to. He let me stay with her the whole time and talked to me and her like a normal person. My pup is recovering nicely but of course doesn't want me to leave her side. I don't mind a little couch time with my girl, she has cuddled me back to health many times, the least I can do is return the favor. :)

My forms

I love Tai Chi and I have been working on my form for several years. It feels like each time I fix something, then I notice something else that needs my attention. At first, I really struggled with always fixing something, I sort of had that I'll never get this right feeling. As I have grown with the form and in my kung fu, I realized that I will always be working on something in all of my forms, just not always the same thing. In the beginning, I needed to learn the moves and the stances and then I needed to learn the form (it takes some time) and after that I needed to get in touch with how it felt to do it right and now I am focusing on my Chi and how it moves. I think that if I could apply this same focus and concentration to all my forms they would vastly improve.
I chose the Tai Chi Broad Sword form this year because the movements are similar to the Tai Chi form that I love. I am really enjoying doing Tai Chi with a weapon, it feels flowy and elegant. I can't really say how it looks when I do it but I know that I like how I feel when I do it. I can feel my Chi moving around, I feel in control of the movements by letting them happen instead of making them happen and I feel good when I do it.
I also chose a hand form that is very different from our usual forms and very different from Tai Chi and I am struggling to make it mine (even after all this time), it still feels like it doesn't belong to me. I think that I will try doing it slow like Tai Chi and see if I can get a sense of it. I know that I keep repeating the same mistake but I am not really sure how to stop it. Perhaps the Tai Chi idea will work, any thoughts from my team will help. I know a few of you have struggled with forms before!

Removed

I seem to be really struggling to find something to write about over the last little bit. I am working on my forms, completing my requirements and recording my progress and I feel a little removed from it all. Not really sure what is going on.

My days

Where have I been? Many places!
I worked on Friday night and discovered a nature reserve by Devon with my kids. It has a lovely boardwalk, information posts about the wildlife in the area and a couple of look out points. The kids had a great time, the best conversation was them discussing the virtues of living in the country versus the city. It was fantastic!
Saturday was a great day. I started the day with the little ones as always, they always warm my heart. I walked over to the marshaling area for the parade and was reminded of how much I enjoy the trails in Stony Plain (I've had some great training experiences there with my friends) and had a great time chatting with my kung fu family before and during the parade. My hat is off to the buyer of the candies, those suckers are great ! (I was part of a committee to test for quality control, for the children!). The demo was great, I always enjoy being a the senior's center.
After my kung fu day, my family enjoyed a gathering to celebrate my brother's birthday (he turned 50). It was a momentous occasion, there was great food, singing, dancing and a photo booth! That young man certainly knows how to celebrate. There were lots of laughs and many memories were created (I can hardly wait for the remember when's to start!), and the best part was experiencing the whole thing with Jim and Katie (the pics tell the tale!!!)
Today I am preparing to go to work, slowly and precisely, and hope to experience another beautiful walk with my work kids this evening.
ps I walked 19,482 steps (8.15 miles) before midnight yesterday and another 3,000 after!!!!!

Tired

What to say, what to say????
Too tired for words today :)

Steps

I am not sure what steps forward I made today. I completed tasks, errands, checked things off my list but it all felt like maintenance not forward movement. In these moments, it is hard to remember that a journey of 1000 miles begins with a single step. I didn't stop, I kept on trying, so I guess that is something. Tomorrow looks to be a day of forms and children, sounds like a good way to pass the time.

Questions

why do you do kung fu? what do you get out of it? are you in it for you? are you doing what you think you should be doing? are you doing it because someone else thinks you should?
what keeps you there? day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year? is it because you love kung fu so much that you can't function without it? is it because you love how you feel when you are doing a form, executing a kick, putting together a combination? is it because you love how you feel when you push yourself further than you ever have before (beyond the arbitrary limits you set for yourself)? is it because you love hanging out with people who love pushing themselves too?
looking for motivation? answer just a few of these questions honestly and you will find the answers!

My pets.....again!

I love my dogs! They make me smile everyday, they keep me company when I am alone and they love me unconditionally. They let me do my work out (most days :) ) and they happily follow me to the kitchen for breakfast afterwards. I love my cat too! Some days I'm sure that he thinks that he is a dog. He has never been around other cats, he was separated from his mom at two weeks and he doesn't do regular cat things (like ignore his people). This morning while I was doing my kicks, he jumped up wrapped up his paws around my leg, looked me in the eye, kinda looked like he was thinking Oh-oh and dropped to the floor. It was so funny because he wrapped his paws around at the exact moment that my leg was fully extended and the dogs looked at him like he was crazy for interrupting my kicks. All in all, another fun kung fu moment brought to you by my pet family.

Food

Just because I was talking about how well my food plan was working out, I had a terrible food day. I had my smoothie this morning after my workout and that was the last thing that was great of  my food intake. I can't really explain it, I just wanted everything in site. I do okay as far as intake went but it wasn't my best day. For example, I really wanted chips so I had almonds and some goat cheese (nice, normal for me, snack) and then a small bowl of chips. The whole day was like that, not really sure why, hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.
On the bright side, I totally have my motivation back and had no trouble getting up early and doing my workout.

Epic

What a great day! The energy was very high and very positive throughout the day, it was fun to see so many parents hanging out with their kids (some of them participating) and it was great to be around my peeps all day long. I enjoyed doing forms with my kung fu friends, I enjoyed visiting with some people that I don't get to see much of and I enjoyed being apart of our school today. The camaraderie, the joking, the support, the encouragement, it was all there and I loved it!!!!
On a more practical side, I completely forgot to take my book! So here it is, I started the day with some warm up forms: da ma hsing, lung, kempo - nice and slow - getting the body and muscles moving (no idea how many reps). Then my friend and I worked on a couple of forms together, picking some pieces apart and trying to do them better - starting and stopping many, many times (no idea how many reps). I moved on to Tai Chi where I did not stop doing the form for approximately one hour ( no idea how many reps). After that there was an amazing fitness - many kicks were done, sit ups, break falls, and all kinds of grappling exercises ( no idea how many kicks or sit ups). The kids game was organized chaos that I totally loved and then more forms with my partner for about an hour (no idea how many reps). I had a great day and I have a few sore muscles to remind over the next few days and I am off to bed with a smile on my face.

Pandamonium

I am really excited that tomorrow is Pandamonium. I think that we have all worked really hard to make tomorrow happen and tomorrow we will work together to show everyone who comes over a great time. It will be an epic day! As I write this my friends have begun their forms, I hope that they have a good few hours while I sleep, see you soon :)

Motivation found!

Today I met a young man who's life is immersed in devastation. His community has suffered many loses as has his family. It is so difficult to help a young person find reasons for living that has such deeply entrenched feelings of hopelessness and helplessness. This young man has asked for a better life, one where he can get an education and, for a time, live separate from his family and community. What courage, what bravery, what a humbling experience that I had today. I am truly blessed to have the opportunity to be in the presence of such determination. I feel like if he can talk steps each day to survive then I can get up in the morning and complete my requirements!!! In case you missed it....motivation found!

Teamwork

I have been thinking a lot about team work today and how we get people to work together. I think that I may have an idea! We need to get everybody working so hard and being so passionate about a common goal that they forget about their ego. I think that ego gets in the way, it makes us wonder - how come I didn't get noticed, how come I didn't get picked. We need to put that aside and worry about getting the job done and not compare ourselves to the next guy. Each one of us is very capable of being The One, we just have to look around, see what needs to be done and figure out how to get it done. It doesn't mean we won't ask lots of questions or get advise from someone who has done it before, it just means that we will do what it takes it get it done and not worry about the next guy. I believe the next guy, if he is looking with his eyes open, will see the leadership and follow along, become a leader themselves in the process.

Progress or not?

Today was much quieter than I thought that it would be. I was very tired today and needed to rest and relax for part of the day, well, mostly the morning. I got some things done this afternoon, not much but not nothing. I made a nice supper for my husband (Katie was at work) and spent some time working on one of my knitting projects. I feel like I am moving forward and starting to see a difference in some of my movements. I hope that I am improving :) Some days it feels like I'm standing still and other days it feels like I going forward in leaps and bounds. I wonder if everyone else is feeling the same sense of roller coastering!

Two days worth

Yesterday was a day fraught with forcing myself to stay on task and do some work that I would have rather avoided. Then I got home from work 20 minutes before class, no time to relax and transition to my homo life. It was all worth it when I went to black belt class and had a great time. We did some cool exercises to improve our kicks and did some even cooler stick moves, so worth the push to get there. Playing the Pandamonium game with my team mates was also a good time and interesting to see how other grown ups play. I spent the rest of the evening with Jim and stayed up too late but I had a good time :)
Today was a fairly mellow day at work, the kids were low key and the sun was shining. We had an opportunity spend some time outside this afternoon and that is always a new avenue to reach the unreachable. I have spent a mellow evening with my family, feeling like I am ready to charge into my days off and get some stuff done! Starting with a nice walk in the morning to feed some beautiful cats that I love :)

Sleepy

I have stayed up way passed my bedtime and I nearly forgot to blog, talk to you all tomorrow when I tell you about my today :)

I have been hacked!

I feel like I should dramatically but my hand over my heart and fall to the ground! I get up this morning and check my mail on my phone and I have 256 new emails, all of them saying Mail Delivery Failure. I had never seen anything like it! It was my more computer smart family that suggested that I was hacked, I couldn't do anything about it because I was also locked out. I called my server and reset my password and spent 20 minutes deleting all the garbage. If you received an email today from me (time stamped between 5 and 5:30 am), it was not me, I was otherwise occupied at that time. I don't understand why people would get any pleasure out of hacking into someone's elses account, but they must get something out of it!?!

I love my pets!

My pet family decided to help me with my workout this morning! First of all, while the dogs were outside, the cat (the usually loving Rascal) decided to grab as much of my yoga matt as he could in his paws (about half for the record), when I called him on it, he took off at the speed of light and tore around the living room and dining room. One set of weights and 50 sit ups done and the dogs are ready to come in! There was a little cat chasing that went on, narrowly missing me while I layed on the floor on my yoga matt!!! Another set done of weights and 50 sit ups. Next each one of the dogs had to come and clean my face while I was still laying on the floor of course. And on it went..... with all that help I managed 300 sit ups, 240 kicks, my weight routine which I have increased to three sets of 10 with 10lbs and Tai Chi. Thank you my pet my family :)

Warmth

I noticed today that not only was the sun shining, it was warm out. Until today the air remained cold, maybe chilly is a better description. I was out on Sunday afternoon walking on the trails and my sensitive lungs let me know that the air had still not warmed up much. Today I was out hanging with my work kids outside and I could totally tell that the air had finally warmed up. This means that I can do my forms outside, especially Tai Chi, and walk more outside which will really increase my mileage. I am secretly hoping to increase my daily steps from 10,000 to 15,000!

sit ups

I think that I need to change/improve my sit ups. Today I was doing my routine and it didn't seem as hard or challenging as it used to. Which, of course, makes sense! If you do the same exercise every day, you are bound to make some muscles and therefore the exercises are easier. Now, I know that the purpose of the whole thing isn't to make it harder/more challenging. But I'm thinking, if I'm going to do it anyways, I might as well make some killer abs while I'm at it! Any ideas anyone? I'm thinking of adding weights, as in, holding the weight while I sit up?

Shift work switch

Throughout my career I have changed holiday celebrations to different days many, many times. If one of us was working on a holiday, we would just celebrate on an alternate day. It has worked for us. This weekend I was off, not preplanned just my turn to be off for the weekend, and I figured it would be nice to be home for Mother's Day. I didn't take into account the youngest member of our family joining the shift work force. Katie has another job that requires her to work weekends and evenings, she still has her old job that is usually one of the weekend days. So today, she worked her day job and then worked the evening shift at her new job. We had to switch Mother's Day to yesterday. It was cool but different, and there were still presents which was good. Since it wasn't me that caused the switch it was a little odd, but I still had a lovely day. I got some things done around the house, had tea with my friend and had a nice walk with my dog. All in all, a good day!

Fun

What a fun day! The usual small children that always make me smile and laugh to start the day :) Followed by a lovely Tai Chi class, it was so relaxing today! Some errands and lunch and it was time to hang out with my peeps, oh yeah, and do a little cleaning. It is so fun to hang out with the team and work on a project and I think the place looks great! It was also fun to have the advanced black dragons to hang with. :)

Tai Chi

My world has tilted slightly and I am not really sure what to make of it. I noticed and so did Sifu Hayes, that when my world is not okay, I carry my center in my shoulders and upper chest. This causes the turtle effect and some really awkward movements on my part. The cool part? I could feel it. The not cool part? I really struggled to stop it. I did my Tai Chi form and that really helped to settle me down but didn't make it go away. When things are happening, I get in my head (think too much) and I have a difficult time getting out. I know Tai Chi will help, I just have to remind myself to stop and do it. Feel free to help me remember!

Under Armor

I bought a new pair of shoes yesterday, you guessed it, they are Under Armor!  I love them! They are light weight, comfortable and pretty :) I wore them all day today and they felt like they have been mine forever. There is nothing like a good pair of shoes.

More Change?

I may have grown a bit more today! I had a very challenging day and I chose to be true to myself and not react to all that was happening around me. It was very hard to not to give in and be visible upset, complain about how it was affecting me but I did it! It feels awesome!!!!! I stayed positive, I stayed me, and I stayed on task and I am so glad that I pushed through and didn't give in to the easy way.

Sleeplessness

Many of you have heard me talk about short change before, my struggle to cope/function when extremely tired continues. Usually, I come home from work at 11:30, get ready for bed and go to sleep. Now that is not enough sleep for me but I am surviving if not thriving. That has not always been the case, before I discovered more about me, I used to spend countless hours laying awake fretting about my life, making short change unmanageable. Since joining Kung Fu and especially the I Ho Chuan, I have not experienced that. I have discovered that as long as I complete my daily requirements, do my very best to be a better person and record my results, I don't fret at night. That was not the case last night, I couldn't sleep! Plain and simple! No worries, day looked good, I am grateful for all that I have in my life, and there I lay, half the night, awake! Needless to say, today was a long day!!!! Now it is bed time, requirements done and logged, I am a better person than I was when I got up this morning and I have counted my blessings. Good Night :)

No Pretending

I'm trying to pretend that I am not tired and cranky and it is not working, so off to bed for me, we'll chat tomorrow.

More forms news

I certainly had a great form day yesterday, some of it was kind of painful when I tried to get my body and brain on the same page but the results were fantastic. I learned some tips and tricks from Sifu Hayes last night and continue to learn more as I practice and more and more of his words come back to me. Does that ever happen to you? You get tonnes of great advise that you are not sure you can possibly take in, but you actually do and it comes back to you when you are ready for it? Well, I think that happened to me. I kept going back to Sifu with more questions and ended up with more information then I thought that I could assimilate, but I was wrong! It is all in my head and it will come out when it is ready, too cool!!!!
Anyways, back to my form...the things that he showed me has changed my flow, my trajectory, my feelings, my motivation to practice more....the list seems endless. I am excited to continue my practice tomorrow and see what happens. :)

Smoothie

I have been looking for the perfect smoothie for quite some time. I thought that I had it a year or so ago and then I embarked on a different journey to find out what kind of food my body likes and stopped making them because they had cow's milk and yogurt which my body doesn't like. So I ask everyone I can think of, I look it up on line, I try different things and nothing is as good without the dairy. The week before last I caught a cold and I was super sick, like in bed all day sick and I had no appetite at all but I definitely needed some nutrition. I think smoothie would work! Sifu Brinker told me that it is good to put broccoli in your smoothie because it is packed with all kinds of amazing nutrients, done. I like strawberries, raspberries and blueberries because they are yummy, done. I also like spinach, a lot, done. I added a bit of protein and some water and ta-da, the most amazing smoothie ever was born. I don't know if it healed me faster or anything like that (I really felt like I was on my death bed for several days!) but I definitely got some nutrient in me and it tasted good. I went back to work on Saturday last week, still sniffling and all but okay and I decided to keep the smoothie in my daily routine. I have had a smoothie everyday since then and been quite pleased with the results. Lots of energy, stayed full and satisfied until lunch and not that many calories. Until today......I figure why not have one of your tried and true breakfast choices instead, what was I thinking? I have literally dragged my butt through this entire day, forcing myself to stay busy and keep moving, I didn't even realize what I had done differently until I was re-capping my day with my husband. I will not skip my smoothie again because today was not fun!

Kids and forms

I had an interesting day in the kid's classes. I tried something that Sifu Vantuil mentioned last week, two obstacle courses and two teams, it was so fun. The kids had a great time and practiced being all the different animals of kung fu while they were at it. In the beginner black dragon class we did bag work and it was reminiscent of classes run by Sifu Frietag when I was a white belt. It was great, the kids worked their butts off, sweated and had a good time. It was very intense and I liked it.
I have been working on my forms and starting to get to know them in a way that I can tell when the stance isn't quite right or sometimes I rush a move to get to the next one, I noticed both of those things today and it felt pretty cool. I feel like both forms are at a turning point this week and I like it. :)

Focus

I had a busy productive day, I did my weekly shopping and errands, had coffee with someone that I would like to call a friend and had a fantastic guitar lesson. When I got up today, I began my day with reminding myself that all that I am doing each day is so that I can be a better me.

• I focus on my acts of kindness each day so that I can learn to pay more  attention to the world around me, 

• I do sit ups and kicks each day so that I can learn the benefits of working towards something daily ( I am noticing stronger muscles !!!!), 

• I write about my day so that I can learn and grow from my mistakes, 

• I hang out with my team mates so that I can learn from them (success and struggles), 

• I track my progress so that I can be encouraged by how far I have come and note the down times so that I can learn from them,

• I look after my family the best way that I can when I am at home so when I am working, I don't  feel guilty( not pretty but true),

•  I practice my forms because I like how it feels when I do them with familiarity (rusty is not a good feeling),

• I practice my guitar every chance I get because it stretches my brain in ways that it has never been stretched before (and it is sooooo cool!),

• I practice Tai Chi everyday because it is my reason for being ( and I believe that encouraging my chi to move is helping my shoulders),

I was thinking (and talking) about what works for me today, what works is reminding myself that this is for me, no one else. If I focus on me then the world around me will benefit from the results 'cause I will definitely be a better person/wife/mother/teammate.

Growth?

I'm not really sure what to write about today, I have some things on my mind that would not be healthy to put out there today, they are mostly dark and disagreeable. I wouldn't want to be a friend listening to some of this garbage so it will remain where it is until I can sort it out.
I had to have some hard conversations today, hard because I had to be quiet and let the other person say their piece first, hard because I had to be brutally honest about what I wanted and what are expectations are, and hard because I had to swallow my disappointment and move forward as usual. This growth thing is not as easy as it looks, but I'm not giving up on myself!

Great Day

I had a great day! It was great to start my day using my muscles and I loved it. I probably worked out a little longer than usual because I was having such a great time but that's ok 'cause I made it to work on time :). Life is grand!

All in!

I was pretty excited to be at the kwoon on Saturday morning, I really missed being there! The kids were fun and Tai Chi was amazing as always ( I learn something every time I go there, it is just amazing to me! ). I didn't stay for fitness or open training because I had to work until 11pm and again this morning so I didn't want to be to worn out on my first day back in the world. I totally felt like I was gone a month not just a week! Work went okay, I was able to catch up on some paper work and kind of take it easy a bit, today was more of the same. I really feel like my regular self today, I felt like napping for a short time, but I shook it off and it passed. Tomorrow, I will resume my morning workout and see how I do. If I continue to get better, I will be back to running by the end of the week :). I am pleased that my fitbit is telling me that I walk 10,000 steps a day on a regular day ( less than 1000 when sick ), so running will increase my miles quite a bit. I am excited to feel 100 % and test out my new toy for realsy.
The best way to stay in touch when not able to do physical things is reading everyone's blogs and making comments and blogging myself. I have been sick during other years and have felt isolated and alone, this time, I really felt like I was still a part of the team.

My butt has been kicked!

I think that I am getting better....I am still pretty tired, I had multiple naps today after trying to do a few things. But I am ready to re-join the land of the living. I am going to the kid's class in the morning and Tai Chi and I am going to work tomorrow. Hopefully, it is not too soon and I end up back on the couch. This was some butt kicking "common cold"

4 long days!

Long days.....resting and healing sucks! I know that I am supposed to be positive but all that I am positive about right now is that I don't like this.
I got up Sunday morning....did my sit ups, kicks, tai chi, weights and started my day. I was pretty tired but I figured I would just shake it off as the day got going. It didn't happen! I made it through my work day, skipped my run due to exhaustion that never went away and came home and crashed on my couch. I have been here ever since...Argghh! Today I was trying to figure out how many reps I have to do each day to get back on track without killing myself. What if I increase my workouts by half? For example, 150 kicks become 200. or 3 reps become 4. I realize that it may take a little longer to get caught up but if I do too much right away, I'll just get sick again ( and I don't want to repeat this anytime soon!).
Tomorrow I plan to push myself a little more than today and hope that I won't end up back on the couch. :)

Uughh!

Yeh, still sick! I feel different than yesterday but horrible just the same. Tomorrow, I insist on feeling better :)

I'm sick

Since I got home from work yesterday, I have been sleeping most of the time. I have a fever, a running nose and there may also be some whining involved! Back to bed!

Day Saved!

I was leaving the grocery store today and I spilled my bag, dumping oranges and a loaf a bread on the ground. So I am wondering, what else can test me today? And then this adorable little boy (about 3 years old), picks up my bread and hands it up to me with an adorable smile. Day saved!

Good Run

The odds were against me...a bad sleep (restless and awake many times - have you ever had one of those nights where you dream that your alarm went off, struggle to wake up only to discover that you were dreaming? I had three dreams like that last night!), long day, a nap was calling and so on. I made it to the track, changed, climbed the stairs and started my warm up and discovered that I forgot to stretch this morning, my legs were tightening up. No problem, get warm and then stretch, it worked! I started my run and my legs felt like they weighed 300 lbs each! I kept going and reminding myself that this was the road to mastery; not pretty, a bit uncomfortable, not exactly what I wanted to be doing and not coming that easy - definitely on the right road! When I was done, I felt great although each step was a struggle.

Change of Plans

When deciding to be silent with some of the groups that I support ( Because I'm a Girl, We Day, The Plan, Free the Children), I did not consider that I had to teach today and I had not pre-planned the day with my team. So I spent most of the day silent and I found it most humbling, each time I considered talking or using my computer, I thought of the children that didn't have a voice and it totally put everything into perspective. I was choosing to do this, they have not chosen their lot in life. I hope that by being silent we have helped spread awareness for them and with awareness comes change!
I spoke to the students in the Beginner Black Dragon class today and they want to be silent next Tuesday. We are not going to use our computers or phones (no texting) and we are not going to speak, even during class. They are going to follow everything that I do, the other instructors may speak but I won't and neither will they. I am excited that they want to do this with me, I hope to help create another generation of caring individuals :)

We Are Silent

Tomorrow I will be silent for the entire day. I will not speak and I will not use any of my electronic devices ( I will blog only if I can stay up past midnight). I will be silent for all of the children in the world that do not have a voice; the ones that live in poverty, in an environment that is not loving, in an environment that does not encourage them to grow and learn. Children can do amazing things when they are nurtured and loved, I believe that it is our responsibility to ensure that each and every child experiences an environment that fosters growth. So for every child who isn't heard, I will be silent for you and hope that my silent speaks volumes.

Fitbit

As the months roll along, I become more and more technologically connected. I have an iPad (thank you generous gift giver), I have traded in my flip phone for an iPhone (thank you my friend and husband) and now I have a Fitbit flex ( thank you surprise early anniversary present). They all communicate with each other, sync their data and completely amaze me with all their capabilities. I still don't understand all that they can do but I hope to learn a little everyday until I do. I am hoping to more accurately keep track of my activities and my calories and be more aware of them. I can't wait to see what a whole day of tracking looks like:)

First Timer

I spent a lot of time with Katie today, helping her with stuff that she had not done before. I didn't really understand until I watched her experience it and then I remembered! When I was 16 yrs old, there were a lot of grown up things that I needed to learn to do that I was a little nervous about before I did them. Sometimes I forget what it was like to be a young person doing things for the first time and on days like today, I am grateful that I can be reminded.
I helped with the advanced Black Dragons tonight which was a lot of fun. I got to see some students that I haven't seen in a while, push them a little harder than I used to be able to and watched them respond by stepping up to the plate. It was a great class.
I also went to see some high school drama with Katie and her friends, it is so cool to see young people who are willing to put themselves out there and not worry about what everyone thinks and so on. I always enjoy hanging out with Katie and her friends and today was no acception :)