Journey

Cool picture, right?

The last entry of 2012.....
When I first started blogging, I found it difficult to imagine blogging every week for a whole year! Now, I sometimes don't make it a whole week without something twigging my blogging fingers.
I have been very reflective lately, thinking about my journey and how I got to be where I am and doing what I am doing. In the beginning, we were told that if we practiced for 10 minutes a day, we could get our black belts. I remember thinking, they can't mean everyday! Now, I get a little antsy if I don't have an hour or two to devote to my kung fu everyday. In the beginning of my I Ho Chuan journey, we talked about reaching great heights and going amazing distances. I remember thinking, they can't mean me! Now, I don't know any other way than to reach as high and as far as I can.
I am at the beginning of my journey as a black belt and it stills feels a little weird when someone calls me Sifu, I catch myself thinking, I'll get a black belt to answer that question, and I feel like a total newby when we are bowing in a class. I am not really sure where my journey will lead me and I am excited to find out.  I want to continue to strive to be amazing, I want to practice hard and I want to try my hardest at everything that I do. I am curious about what I will reflect upon at this time next year or the year after. I am very glad that I have this blog to help me remember and to leave a trail of crumbs in case I need them.
Happy New Year Everyone!

Awesome!

My dear friend gave me a journal yesterday, it is called The Journal of Awesome . This is what is says in the foreward:
Hi Everyone,
A few years ago I hit some giant speed bumps in life. Within the span of a few months, my wife told me she didn't love me anymore and my best friend lost the battle with serious illness. I was heart-broken and lonely, and my mind was all over the place.
I found a lot of comfort back then in writing about one awesome thing every single day. I would come home from work and start jotting notes about random little things - like the cold side of the pillow, the smell of a bakery, or finding five bucks in my coat pocket - and just sort of smile to myself.
Over time these awesome things started putting my mind in a different place. They helped me get to bed without a twisted stomach. They helped me find focus on all the little things that make life so awesome. 
So I kept coming home and writing about one awesome thing every day. I kept writing and writing and writing until my little website called 1000 Awesome Things suddenly won some big awards and got published as The Book of Awesome and then  The Book of  (even more) Awesome and then The Book of (holiday) Awesome in dozens of countries and languages around the world.
The Journal of Awesome was created in response to teachers, preachers, grandparents and grandkids who told me they started writing their own little thoughts about what them think, smile and laugh from their day.
This journal is a wide open space for you to share your big wishes, dream your big dreams and remember all the precious little moments that make up your day. I've filled it up with pictures, prompts and reminders of how awesome life can be. I know you've lots of your own thoughts too, and I think that together we can create something pretty special.
Let's have some fun and let's stay awesome forever and ever and ever.

I am going to use the journal to record all the amazingly awesome things that happen in my world every day. From time to time, I will share them in my blog.

Merry Christmas Everyone! I hope that you are all blessed with some awesome this holiday season!!!

Truth

I found this after I posted my journal this week and I wanted to share it!

I can

Do you ever wonder why things happen? Where is the"good" in a tragedy? What are we supposed to learn from the senseless death of small children? Today, the lesson is lost on me.

• I can thank God for my blessings

• I can be more empathetic towards people who suffer from mental illness

• I can not worry about the small stuff and be glad that I have small stuff to worry about

• I can pray for the families that have suffered during a time that they should be rejoicing in the birth of our Lord 

• I can pray that there is more world wide understanding and assistance for mental illness

• I can appreciate what I have in my life and not take for granted that I will always have it

• I can't make someone else's pain go away, but I can pray that they will find peace and accept what has happened. 

Until next week.......

TIME

When I first started my journey towards my black belt, I didn't really understand what it would take to reach my goal. I listened to what my teachers told me but I didn't really hear them. At first I was jumping through hoops, doing what I thought others wanted me to do  and what I thought that I should be doing. I was not successful! I spent the better part of a year wandering about without focus. One day, I realized that there was nothing left for me to do except get down to it. I started to take ownership for my training and figured out that the only thing that lay between me and my goal was me. Although I had completed many reps of my forms and techniques and combinations, I hadn't spent any "time" with them. I needed to do my forms mindfully, feel how it was to move the way I wanted to and seek feedback from my mentors on how to make improvements. I spent hours and hours, with no distractions,with myself. I focused on every aspect of being a good martial artist and took the steps that I thought were important to help me reach my goal. It took me a long time to figure this out and once I did, it took a long time to reach my goal. It doesn't need to take you a long time to reach your goals, just a period of time where you are consistently, mindfully working towards them (Take consistent action!). If you are serious about your goals and you want to do it right, there are no short cuts, no easy way, just hard work and commitment.

Peace

In life, when you walk away from all the drama and people who create it,

You surround yourself with people who make you laugh, forget the bad, and focus on the good. 

So love the people who treat you right, pray for the ones who don't.

Life is too short to be anything but happy.

Falling down is a part of life, getting back up is living.

Who do you trust

I want to talk about trust. How do we build trust? What does it take to keep trust?
In KungFu, we begin our journey as a white belt, not really sure if we are on the right path. We are open to learning something new and by virtue of showing up, have put some trust in the instructors to introduce us to their art. As we are laying the ground work, we are gaining the trust of the instructors by how we are processing the information that we are receiving. Are we showing respect, are we doing what they ask (practicing), are we demonstrating that we can learn by retaining what they show us, so they are able to show us more? They are also earning our trust by giving us stuff to learn, not too much and not too little. Over time, they discover what we need to grow and prosper and we learn to trust that they know best.
Throughout our martial arts training, this process repeats itself over and over again. Whether you have been promoted and moved to a different class or have decided to try your hand at Tai Chi or San Shou, you begin the trust building process again, with a new teacher or with the same one and a slightly different curriculum. Trust is one of the foundations that we build on from the very first day that we step on the mats.
We keep that precious trust that we have fostered by trying our hardest each and every time, and by being honest about our abilities and disabilities. Our instructors need to know that no matter what our belt level, we are there to learn, and our students need to know that as long as they are trying, we are there to teach and motivate them.
You might be wondering why this relationship is so important? Well, our instructors need to know that we will respect the skills that we are being taught. And we, the students need to know, that the instructors will respect us as they are teaching us.  We can not have respect without the trust.
These are my thoughts for this week,

Rest and Relax

This past week has been challenging for me because I have been sick again! I have slept a lot, read a lot, knitted a lot and rediscovered that I love to build puzzles. I don't sit still well but that is the only way I can get better is to rest and relax. When I build a puzzle, I totally zone out and let my mind go, could this be like meditating? I like moving mediation the best but could building a puzzle and letting your mind go receive similar benefits? I will continue to practice and report my results.
Until next week, stay healthy and don't forget to look after yourself

Excitement and Frustration

I am super excited about doing my forms! I think that I have had a break through and I am excited to explore it more. I think that I have been on the verge of this discovery for a while now but I just needed to let it happen. I have had glimpses of awareness in my movements when I have been training really hard but it always seemed slightly out of reach and it seemed to have taken a lot of work and concentration to get to that moment. The other day I was working on Kempo 1 and suddenly I could feel exactly what I needed to change. On another day, I was doing Hung 1 & Hung 2 and could feel where the flow was and where it definitely was not. I have been pushing myself for this insight for a while and until now have only had a glimpse of it. I think now I can correct the parts of my forms that I have been trying to figure out. I just needed to let it happen. Now the work begins! I think that I am going to do all my forms really slow (like Tai Chi) but still try and maintain the same moves so that I can figure out how to change things. I have already started with Kempo and although there is tons of work to do,I am happy to have a direction.
Now for the frustrating part, my bronchitis is almost all gone and all that is left is the damage. I am still having a hard time breathing when I try to do anything cardio and I get tired easily. Last night, we did some drills and I pushed myself until I had no strength left (which felt really good!) but that left me so short of breath, I couldn't believe it. So I am left with the challenge of pushing myself a little but not so much that I halt the healing process. It seems like it has been a while since I had to take it easy while I heal and had forgotten how much I disliked it. (okay, it makes me kinda cranky!) The positive side is that I will improve my forms immensely as I do them slowly and focus on the details.
That is what is happening in my little world this week,

A better life...

http://www.highexistence.com/life-secrets-and-tips/comment-page-1/
I stumbled upon this site today and was pleasantly surprised to read the 50 tips and secrets to a better life. They are very similar to the list of things that we are trying to accomplish on the I Ho Chuan team, I hope that you take a moment and enjoy them.
Those are my thoughts for this week.......

9 Things to Think About Before You Give Up

If you feel like you’re at the end the road with nowhere to go, realize you are lying to yourself.  You have imprisoned yourself in your own mind by telling self-defeating stories – stories about what your life should be like, what you should have already accomplished, and so forth.  By doing this you’ve created a tiny space in your mind and you’ve begun to believe you are actually living in it.
But you are NOT.  You are alive in a vast world with infinite destinations.  Take a moment to remind yourself of this.  Go outside.  Look at the sky and the clouds.  THIS is the space in which you really live.  Breathe it in.  Then look at your current situation again.
Here are some things you need to consider before you give up:

1. You never fail until you’re satisfied with failure. – Failure is not falling down; failure is staying down when you have the choice to get back up.  Sometimes you have to fail a thousand times to succeed.  Which means you haven’t really failed yet; you’ve just found a bunch of ways that don’t work.  So don’t get so hung up on a few failed attempts that you miss every new opportunity coming your way.  All of your ideas that don’t work are simply stepping stones on your way to the one idea that does.  As Winston Churchill once said, “Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”  Read Awaken the Giant Within.
2. What you have learned is what’s important. – Life always offers you a second chance – it’s called tomorrow.  But this second chance doesn’t mean anything if you haven’t learned from the events of today.  You have to acknowledge your troubles but gather strength from them, and laugh at your mistakes but learn from them.  Getting a second chance in life is about giving yourself the opportunity to grow beyond your past failures.  It’s about learning as you go and positively adjusting your attitude and efforts toward future possibilities.
3. Tough times are just part of life’s natural balance. – Life lives, life dies.  Life laughs, life cries.  Life gives up and life tries.  And life looks different through everyone’s eyes.  In fact, who you were, who you are, and who you will become are three completely different people.  And as you gradually grow beyond the person you were yesterday, keep life’s challenges in perspective.  Hear life’s harmony, and notice the delicate balance.  Realize that life is like playing a grand piano.  The white keys create your happiness and the black keys denote your troubles.  But as you go through life’s journey, remember that the black keys also create music.
4. Pain helps you grow. – Sometimes things must change so you can change.  Sometimes you must break a little so you can get a peek inside to see what an awesome powerhouse you are.  Sometimes mistakes must be made so wisdom can be earned.  Sometimes you must overcome heartache so you can begin to follow your heart again.
5. Success is a way of living. – Don’t let your struggles become your identity.  Not everything in your life will go as you expect it to.  This is why you need to drop expectations, live in the present, and go with the flow, rather than against it.  Remind yourself that it’s perfectly okay not to be perfect.  Ultimately, success is not something you achieve, it is what you learn and how you grow as you deal with the realities of life – it is a way of living and being.  Read As a Man Thinketh.
6. You can choose differently. – The difference between a mountain and a molehill is your perspective.  And in many cases, the only thing in life you have control over is your perspective.  No matter what happens, YOU control what the meaning is, and what to do with the meaning you give to the circumstance.  Choose to react in a way that motivates happiness, love, or forgiveness, even when circumstances make that choice difficult.
7. It’s not supposed to be easy. – Just because you’re not where you want to be today doesn’t mean you won’t be there someday.  Again, success is tied to long-term determination.  Successful people keep moving and trying.  They make mistakes, but they do not quit.  If things in your life aren’t happening as planned right now, that’s okay.  It just means it’s not the right time.  Life’s brick walls are not there to keep you out, they’re there to give you a chance to show how badly you want something.  They’re there to stop the people who don’t want it as bad as you do.
8. Simplify, simplify, simplify. – Like all magnificent things, life is quite simple.  Its simplicity is found not in seeing how little you can get by with – that’s poverty – but how efficiently you can conquer your biggest difficulties.  Remember, the greatest wisdom of life consists in the elimination of non-essentials.  Your most significant ideas and accomplishments will be genius in their simplicity.  One day you will find the right words, the right decisions, and the right solutions that will lead you to victory, and they will be far simpler than they seem right now.  Read The Power of Less.
9. Life is still good. – You may have seen better days, but you have also seen worse.  You might not have all your wants, but you do have all your needs.  You woke up with a few aches and pains, but you woke up.  Your life may not be perfect, but it is good.  And more good things are coming down the road as long as you keep moving forward.

 http://www.marcandangel.com/2012/11/02/9-things-to-think-about-before-you-give-up/#more-528

Journalling

 Journaling

 We watched a show(Nova -Science Now) about brain power (it also had a cool part about how your brain grows when you learn to play the piano) and how journaling really helps reduce anxiety and can decrease the chances of choking during high stress moments. They did a test and had high school students, who were interested, journal prior to a big test. The ones that chose to journal did much better on their exams than the ones that chose not to. The journals were not elaborate and only depicted how they were feeling at the time. The students stated during interviews that it helped them calm down prior to the exam. Imagine the reduced anxiety we would feel if we journalled prior to our kung fu tests?
I found this show very interesting and educational. I usually blog each week because it gives me an opportunity to reflect on my week, my progress and my kung fu. I did not consider that it helped me relax and stay focused. When I was younger, I used to journal to help me through troubled times, to explore my feelings and tangled thoughts. I think that I am going to increase my journaling to include a private daily journal as a means of staying more focused and more in tune with my thoughts and feelings.
Those are my thoughts for this week

Balance

The demo yesterday was amazing! It was so cool to be a part of and to kind of stand back and watch unfold. I think that the seniors really enjoyed our performance and have asked that we come back again with more to show them. I really enjoyed watching my teammates perform their forms, techniques and board breaks, I think everyone looked fantastic! I enjoyed preparing for this demo, although getting up at 4 am to get ready for work before the practice stretched my limits. Well, probably going back after work to teach and practice some more is probably what really tested my abilities. I still liked it! Mostly because everyone else was willing to do it too. I usually come up with these hair-brain ideas and no one else wants to do them, this time everyone said yes!!!
Once again it is the end of a long week and I am finding myself saying Hi to the family that I neglected all week. They never complain and are always supportive but I feel guilty when I spend more time at the kwoon than home and I am when I am here it is time to sleep. I know that it is about balance and this next week the scales will tip a little bit more towards normal, with no evening shifts and no extra practices, I might feel a little less stretched.
I seem to have picked up a head cold along the way, so I feel a bit rambley in my blog today and a bit sleepy, I will sign off for now.....
Those are my thoughts for this week.

Note to self

I read Mr.Repay's blog earlier this week and he challenged all who read his blog to write a letter to their 15 year old self. Here is my version:
Dear 15 yr old self;
I know that you haven't had much success in the people department, but don't give up. Keep trying to meet new people, trust a little tiny bit and let that grow in a natural way. There really are good, caring people out there, you just haven't met them yet.
Be patient with yourself as you grow and learn, don't rush things that need time and nurturing to grow naturally.
You are a good person with a good heart, please believe that and let that guide your choices.
Trust that you are smart, you may have made some not smart choices but you are really smart, allow yourself to learn.
Above all else, I want to tell you that you are worth it, all of it, don't ever forget that!
Love from me

What would you say to your 15 year old self?
 Sifu Kichko

Thankfulness! Gratefulness!!!

I am grateful for so many things in my life;
First of all I am grateful to God, He is the reason for all the is good in my life and the obstacles that I need to overcome to grow.
I am grateful for my husband, he has supported and encouraged me for nearly twenty years. He always there for me as I attempt to be a better me, cheering me on and helping me out when I fall down.
I am grateful for my daughter, she believes that there is nothing that I can't do! What an amazing feeling that is!!
I am grateful  for the life that I have, it is full of goodness and love. I have good friends, near and far, and I have family members that accept me for who I have become.
I am grateful for my job, I have been working with children and families for approx. 23 yrs, and they never cease to amaze me, their capacity to love one another and over-come diversity in order to be together is over-whelming at times.
I am grateful for my pet family, they make me laugh, cry and sigh with contentment. I love that I can have these animals in my life and they show me the true meaning of unconditional love. No matter how the rest of the world treats me, when I come home, I am greeted with so much love and excitement that all else is forgotten.
I am grateful for my kung fu family, I truly feel like I have found a place where I belong and I am completed accepted. I love my family. My goal is to pass that feeling on and treat each person that walks in the door with compassion and understanding so that they will experience the same feelings that I have.
I am grateful for the opportunities that I have had to volunteer in my community. I have gained so much empathy from our projects.
There are many more things that I am grateful for but that would make this a really long blog. My goal is to remind myself throughout the year, not only during Thanksgiving.
Those are my thoughts for this week.

Influence

One of the things that has influenced me the most is the leadership requirement. It is not what I thought it was going to be. I figured that we would be told what needs to be done and then we would go forth and make it so. I thought that since I enjoyed leadership that it would not be a difficult or challenging requirement. I did not fully understand the requirement until  recently. I understand now that it is not about any one of us improving our leadership skills, it is about each of us being a leader. We are all leading the school, some of us are outspoken and loudly encouraging others to do stuff (get involved, try harder, etc) and some of us are quietly being amazing and encouraging others with our actions ( always doing push ups, forms,being there, etc). There different types of leaders and different types of leadership and I think we are all taking strides in the direction that will serve us best. Personally, I have been doing things that I have never done before and I kind of like it. I used to think that I was leading by doing what we were supposed to do, I am learning that I can also lead by doing what needs to be done. It is a bit scarey at first but I am getting used to it. I find myself thinking, am I doing this right? Is this how I am supposed to be doing? The answer is yes and yes because I am doing it. I am hoping to continue to grow in this area and learn more about leading people in the direction that they need to go.
One of the other requirements that has served me so far is the one where we have to mend a relationship. I have been wanting to mend the relationship with my brother Tim for a few years but I was kind of chicken. I was afraid that if I made an effort of any sort it would not be reciprocated. So after having this on my list for a few years, I took the plunge this year. I invited him for lunch and honestly told him how I felt, that I missed hanging out with him and hoped that we could move forward in our relationship. I was surprised to learn that he missed me too. We have only seen each other a few times so far but it is going well and there is a major bonus. Katie is getting to know her uncle and aunt and they are getting along quite well and creating a relationship of their own.
I am also supposed to write about my personal requirements that have served me well. The thing is that I have a difficult time doing stuff for me. I put two things on my list that I have always wanted to do, they are not for anyone else, just me and I keep putting off doing anything about it. I will leave them on my goal list until I do something about them as I don't want to give up.
Those are my thoughts for this week

Fall

So here are a few pictures from my family album. These are a few of the things that cross my mind when I think of fall.
- Having Katie "help" me rake the leaves in the front yard is a memory that always makes me smile
- I love the color of flowers in the fall, the orange being my favorite followed closely by dark red
- I always say a little good bye to the green leaves and look forward to seeing them again in the spring

I sometimes wonder if we can focus on the simpler things in life, perhaps life would be a bit easier. If we stopped worrying about what we didn't have and how long it will take us to get it, would we be more satisfied? If we are grateful for our lives and concentrated on helping others with theirs, would we be more fulfilled?
Those are my thoughts for now
Sifu Kichko

Learning

I really wanted to make a picture collage of what fall means to me but I have not been successful. I am going to ask someone with more computer experience than I to help me.  I have a difficult time asking for help so that will be my challenge for this week and hopefully there will be some beautiful pictures to post soon.

Emotions!!!

This week was powered by emotions of one sort or another. Some of them tried real hard to rule my actions but I persevered and didn't give in. I have been working really hard recently to control my emotional reaction to what is happening around me. It is mostly for work but it is helping in other areas of my life.

I cracked up when I saw this picture! I want to be a cat!!!!!

What usually happens when I get upset is that I turtle and don't do anything except eat things that I shouldn't. What I have been doing is recognize that something is upsetting me and try to analyze, in the moment, how best to handle it. What to say, how to act and how to react. It is not a 100% fool-proof plan just yet but it is beginning to slow me down a bit and I get in less trouble.
It is especially helpful at work where I have a tendency to react emotionally, say the wrong thing and make matters worse. So now I am taking a minute to gather my thoughts before I speak and spending a few minutes thinking through my actions before I act. It feels like a lot of hard work right now but I know that it is worth it.
I have also been dealing with an seemingly over-whelming feeling of not being able to handle what is put in front of me. It feels like it is too much, one more thing and I will explode! I am not sure where this is coming from or why but I know that I need to keep putting one foot in front of the other and keep moving forward. I know that if I give in to the feelings, it will only make matters worse and I know that if I have a great work out then I feel better. So that is my big plan so far, 1) Do what I can, I don't have to do everything at once! and 2) Keep working out as much as possible, it is something that I have control over!

Demo practice

I wasn't really sure what to write about this week until I read Sihing Kreb's blog and realized that my blogging isn't just for me, people actually read it!
The last two weeks have been all about putting a demo together. Last week, we squeezed practices in when the dragon wasn't dancing. It was a lot of fun practicing in the park, I really enjoy the feel of the earth under my feet when I do my forms (even if there is mud oozing between my toes!). When you get a group of martial artists hanging out in a park, practicing what they love to do, you get a buzz that is indescribable! I want to say wicked awesome right here!!!! It is a buzz that carries into everything that you do, and it has people looking at  you and saying I want some of that.
This past week, we were inside, practicing after everyone had gone home. For me, it was reminiscent of late night practices for the Chinese New Year banquet, I liked it. On a couple of nights, I truly dragged my butt home so tired that I was already doing that twitching thing that happens sometimes before you fall asleep before I finished washing up. I still liked it!
On Friday, we unveiled our demo to the coaches and the students that we not able to be in it. The buzz in the kwoon was amazing! We were nervous and excited all at the same time, I loved it. I can honestly say that I am not sure how it really looked but being part of that moving energy was an incredible high. I walked away wanting to do it again and again and I hope that my teammates feel the same way.
The week ended for me at that point as I have come down with the head cold that is making it's rounds in my family and have had to take a day off.
I am so excited about my kung fu right now that I can hardly stand myself, it is all that I think about, in a good way. I think that I figured something out during feedback of the demo that has been plaguing me for years, I haven't been able to put my theory into practice but I will report on it as soon as I do.
Until next week, work hard and have fun.

Kung Fu things

I have lots of kung fu things on my mind right now. Demos, performances, volunteering, organizing, fund raising, leadership, mentorship, forms (fitting them to music) and perfecting what I have, teaching, learning.....I could go on and on. I feel fully immersed in my kung fu journey right now and it feels great.
We have been practicing a demo together that has been tons of fun, I love getting together with my team mates and creating something amazing. We feed off each other, share ideas and I am not the only one that wants to do one more rep. And no matter what happens, we always share a laugh!
I have been talking to people about doing a demo for them and I have been pleasantly surprised by how many are excited to have us come out and share a bit of ourselves with them. It has been a great experience so far, I'll keep you posted as the experience continues.
I love volunteering in my community and each year I look forward to shoveling for seniors. I don't mind the shoveling and I fully enjoy meeting the people that we help. They all have a story to tell and I love a good story.
I have discovered that I like fund raising because I have changed my perspective to focus on talking about the charities that we support and not really focusing on the money part. I am glad when people give me donations or buys my tickets but I really feel like I have a winner when someone takes a minute to find out about the charities that we support.
When it comes to leadership and mentorship, I am not really sure that I know what I am doing. I know the type of leadership that I respond to and I know who I want to be like.  I know that when I first started doing acts of kindness, I tried to act as if someone was watching me and counting my actions. Now I am watching me and I tried to act in a manner that I can be proud of everyday. I hope that makes me worthy of being someone's mentor.
I have been thinking and talking about teaching and learning a lot lately. I enjoy sharing what I know with others, young and old. I also enjoy figuring things out with others, like a form or how to help someone when they aren't very receptive to input. I work as part of a team in my career and have recently discovered that I am part of a large kung fu team that are all working hard to preserving our art.  I enjoy learning as part of a team, whether it is trying to reach a resistant teen or figuring out how to do a technique.
Those are the many things that are on my mind.
Until next week, work hard and have fun.

Another step on the road to mastery

What a great week! I am completely out of my element when it comes to this type of work. As usual, I make up in enthusiasm what I lack in skill.
I have enjoyed spending time with the students and leaving a little part of me in the kwoon. It is very difficult to put into words the impact that this has had on me and my training. I have worked very hard on my kung fu over the years and seen the benefits in my art and in my confidence. This week, I have worked very hard at our training hall and I feel like I deserve to train there now. I have had to make it a priority and make some adjustments in my schedule in to order to get the job done. The experience reminded me of when I first started working towards mastery, I had to adjust my life a little bit and make mastery a priority.
I get it! I embraced the opportunity and I am better for it.

Goals

Robyn Kichko’s I Ho Chuan Goals 2012

I will not quit

I will log and complete 50,000 pushups or equivalent ( lat pull downs, flys, pull ups, tricep and bicep curls) - early in the year I discovered that I was hurting my shoulders more and more, so I decided to do 50,000 kicks instead and work with weights to improve the strength in my shoulders and supporting muscles.

I will build towards and complete 10 pull ups by the end of the year - still working on this.

I will log and complete 50,000 kicks - 25,050 - I know that my numbers will get back on track as soon as my toes heal.

I will log and complete 50,000 sit ups - 34,350

I will complete 1000 rounds of sparring - 527 minutes

I will log and complete 1000 acts of kindness - 641

I will log and complete 1000 miles (1609 km) running, walking, swimming or biking - 913.62

I will work towards mastering my stick form by logging and completing at least 1000 reps and seeking feedback from my teachers and peers. - 56 - hopefully this will improve as my shoulders heal more

I will work towards mastering my nunchucks form by logging and completing at least 1000 reps and seeking feedback from my teachers and peers - 756 totally continuing to love this form

I will mend a relationship - this is harder than I thought, it takes risk and accepting of responsibility for one's lack of action. 

I will participate in and help organize the adopt a driveway program - I love being a part of this program, I am going to create a video of our participants and recipients

I will participate in and help organize the annual renovations of our kwoon - I plan to be at the kwoon each day this week, doing whatever I can to help make it an awesome place to hang out.

I will research, organize and lead a group of people to become actively involved in volunteering in the community on a weekly basis - this one is still in the planning stages and I am not quite ready to reveal it.

I will spend one weekend learning how to ride a motorcycyle - I continue to chicken out on this, in the winter I have myself totally convinced that I want this and that I am capable, but as soon as it is nice out, I chicken out. I thought if it was a public goal, I would push myself further and I did, I chose the course but I did not call to set it up.

I will take tennis lessons, either from a friend at work or from the tennis club in Spruce Grove - I have taken exactly one tennis lesson this year and I loved it.

I will continue to blog about my kung fu journey in my weekly blog - my life journey and my kung fu journey are one in the same, that is what I write about each week.

I will maintain my Flavors.me page-  this is up to date, I was going to change it last week but realized that I have grown into the words that I so hopefully wrote in January

I will compete in the annual Tiger Challenge - I am hoping that we can gather enough interest to organize and run a challenge.

I will learn to Lion Dance - I allowed an opportunity to pass in June, so I have been kicking myself and looking for another ever since, perhaps I will have to create an opportunity!

I will qualify and perform in at least three public performances - one at the library in January, the Chinese New Year's Celebration, and one at an elementary school for a group of young ladies

I will memorize and recite Mastery by Stuart Emery - I probably could not stand and recite the whole thing word for word but each day I recite a part of it to help me stay on my path to mastery

I will qualify to teach at the annual forms seminar - I have been teaching the nunchucks form since January, does that mean that I qualify? Only if pouring your heart into it is the measure.

Good Morning!

I have spent most of my adult life fighting my natural tendencies. I stay up late at night for work or for fun (I love a good movie night) and drag my butt through the next day. I love to get up early and do stuff and I didn't know that about myself until I joined my first UBBT team as a student. The only way to fit all the things that I wanted to into each day was to get up earlier. The more I trained the happier I was and the earlier that I would get up. Sometimes, common sense says, if you go to bed at midnight, you shouldn't get up at 5 am and expect to have a productive day. So I don't always get up early, I am working on making my shifts match my natural tendencies, but I do try to get up early enough to train before I do anything else. It is not just about getting the stuff out of the way, it is about starting the day off on the right foot. In my opinion there is nothing better than getting up because you want to and practicing what you love to do before you have to do anything else. This has also opened up many other time saving opportunities for me, did you know that not many people are in the grocery stores at 8 am? I can get my food in half the time when there are only two or three other customers. I started walking my dog before the days got too warm earlier in the summer and before I knew it, I was out of the house at 6 am and fully enjoying a peaceful walk before the day got busy. I have yet to master doing forms outside with the dog along for company (she always wants to join the imaginary fight during forms) but I am going to keep trying. Maybe when she is older, she will just lay in the grass and patiently wait until I am done! ( Well, I can dream!!!)
That is what is on my mind today, until next week, work hard and have fun!

Trusting me

Trusting myself is sometimes a challenge, it is new to me and sometimes I forget! It is true, it is much easier to return to old behavior than it is to forge ahead and see what happens. Each time that I have trusted myself, I have been rewarded with positive results, so the trick is to remember that. I think that I have really good instincts and I need to learn to trust them. When I don't trust myself (basically my instincts) then I try too hard and that gets me in trouble. Some examples of that are trying to fit in, trying to be a friend, trying to look like I know what I am doing. If I trust myself and just be, then I just shine on through and everything is cool. So I have been trying hard to be a good teammate and I think what I need to do is trust my instincts and just be who I am and the rest will take care of itself.
I will be posting more about what I am doing, the when, the where and the what, and I invite anyone and everyone to join me whenever you like.
Until next time, work hard and have fun
Sifu Kichko

Ahhh! Work.....

I just finished reading all the blogs that were written today and they were great. Insightful, thoughtful and encouraging, I loved them all. I don't have any such things to write about.
I returned to work this week and I am pretty tired! I had to miss the dragon dance practice and the black belt class and sparring with the I Ho Chuan team due to my schedule, but I did not miss any of my morning classes and was able to attend all the Saturday classes. It seems to be a good balance for me.
At the beginning of my vacation, I spoke to the I Ho Chuan team about my challenges at work and how hard it is for me to remain optimistic when surrounded by non-like minded people. I also expressed my excitement about getting to spend a month (my holidays) hanging out only with like-minded people at kung fu and getting grounded and figuring out how to be stronger. I am pleased to report that I have felt much more calm in the face of adversity this week and I felt confident that I could handle any confrontations that may occur. I have two very stronge supporters, who remind me of all the work I have done to improve my mind, body and spirit, and they definitely helped me stay grounded and calm so far this week. My week is not quite over but I am sure that I will stay true to who I am as I deal with the next few days.

More than one thought!

More than one thing on my mind this morning.....
- I have been spending time doing more activities with my daughter over the last little while and I am filled with many different thoughts and emotions. I have always tired hard to ensure that Katie knows the importance of being active and eating right. We started when she was very little and I took her everywhere I went, strapped to me or in the stroller. Then we graduated to me running/walking and her on her tricycle, I probably carried that thing more than I cared to! After that, the Tri-Leisure Center opened and I used to take Katie to the track with me. We used walkie-talkies and she would sit on a mat with her books and music and tell me stories and sing me songs over the air while I ran. It didn't seem like it was long before she was running with me, not beside but keeping her own pace, doing her own thing at the same time as me. It was pretty cool. Then we moved forward from there and she began to search for her independence! She wanted to be active with her friends, at the leisure center and sometimes outside. It is an interesting process for me to accept that I had accomplished my goal of instilling the importance of activity and acknowledging that it wouldn't always be me that she did her activities with as she needs to find her own way and figure out what works for her. I treasure the time that we do spend together and am pleased that she can set goals and strive to reach them, overcoming obstacles as she encounters them. Katie recently lead me on a 20 km bike marathon around the City of Spruce Grove (on and off the trails), it was a blast and humbling at times when I struggled to keep up. I am proud/pleased that I have passed on the importance of being active.
- What to eat and what not to eat! I am enjoying experimenting with different foods and am completely relieved to not have as much pain and discomfort. I have had some success and some failure in the kitchen but the best part is that my family is once again willing to try what I try in hopes of finding some positive affects. I haven't been doing this very long and sometimes my emotions try to lead me back to old eating patterns. So far, if I stop and assess, the feeling/need to eat something that will upset my stomach goes away with a little bit of reasoning. I did try DQ ice cream this week, I used to think this was a safe thing for me to eat, not so much. I am amazed at how easy it is to pick up on what is good and bad with my system nearly all cleaned out. My reactions are quicker and go away faster if there is only one food to deal with, I am looking forward to more and more success in the kitchen and with my health issues.
- I am enjoying spending more time with my I Ho Chuan teammates in the last couple of weeks, I am hoping that we can keep the momentum going and continue to find times and reasons to hang out together. The dragon dance is evolving as we have new members on the team and new ideas to try. It is a lot of fun and I am hoping that more teammates can come and spend some time with us. (Every Thurs @ 7:15pm ). It is also very energizing on Saturdays when there are more people at open training. I am loving getting back into sparring and re-learning some valuable lessons about keeping my guards up! I am also enjoying doing forms with a variety of people and learning about how others move, it is always educational! I have been playing with my chucks more in the last couple of weeks (relaxing! having fun!) and they are beginning to feel different in my hands. More like they are a part of me, instead of an extension of me. I don't know if that is right or wrong but that is where I am in the process.
That is all for me this week ( I probably shouldn't have blogged about one or another of these topics earlier in the week, but it didn't occur to me that I could blog  on a day other than Sunday!). I am going back to work on Thurs. so that means that I have to be more strict with my time, but I am excited about integrating more early morning work outs to my schedule. I have established some really good routines while on holidays so I am hoping to work out a way to keep some of that routine. I am surprised and impressed by what a difference in makes in my daily outlook when I get up early and work towards some of my goals.

Gluten Free

This really is gluten free bread!

This has been a tough week, healthwise. I have IBS and usually can keep it under control with healthy eating and plenty of exercise. When I add stress to that then it doesn't seem to matter what I eat, I get sick. So I have been doing some research (not successfully) and wondering what else I can change about my diet to decrease these bouts of pain and discomfort. I finally asked for help and received way more than I deserved (I have turned down help before) and I think that I may be on to something.
I have slowly been eliminating bread products from my diet. I stopped eating any white flour a couple of years ago as it seemed to upset my stomach, then I stopped eating wheat flours ( a weird allergic reaction reared it's ugly head during practice for the Chinese New Year's Banquet ) and switched to rye only. I have noticed over the last few months, that when I have rye bread, I don't feel as energetic as I do without it. That lead me to (hat in hand) ask for some information about eating gluten free. I had heard a little bit about it ( in I Ho Chuan meetings) and from a friend who is celiac but I had no idea what it entailed. I have been gluten free since Thurs (maybe Wed, I would have to check my food journal) and I feel fantastic! It did not take much of a change as I have been taking away things when they don't provide me with the food energy that I am looking for. Last year when I was on the UBBT team, I spent a great deal of time trying to maximize my food energy so that I could do more things in a day (my theory is, if you are going to demand great things from yourself, you have to give yourself the fuel it needs to get there). I continue to be just as busy on the I Ho Chuan team and continue to demand a lot from myself ( if you have no energy then it is an uphill battle) and I continue to monitor my food intake and be very aware of how I react to it. The last few days have been fantastic, I continue to get as many things completed each day but I am not completely wiped out at the end of it. I have no pain and my stomach has settled down to normal. I don't feel deprived of anything ( well, I would like a gluten free muffing that didn't taste like baking soda!) and I am eating healthier than ever. Instead of waiting patiently for things to be done so that I can rest, I am completing tasks and requirements and then looking for more to do.
This is just one more thing that I have UBBT/I Ho Chuan to thank for. Striving for mastery in every aspect in my life is the only key to successful living.

Just Relax!

Ahhhh......my nunchucks!
I love them! I think that each person has a weapon that just speaks to them and I have definitely found mine. When asked did I think that I would be interested in learning the chuck form, I responded with, could I? I would love to! That was before I even picked them up, I just knew that we would be perfect for each other. They are teaching me about how I move and how I need to move differently. I'd like to think that I am teaching them a thing or two but that is probably just ego talking. I am learning more and more about myself each time I do the form or try a new move. Speaking of new moves, my teacher was attempting to show me a thing or two yesterday. He advised that I relax and have fun with it. I am sure that I looked at him like he had three heads. It is not secret that I love kung fu and love nothing better than practicing all day every day that I can manage it. And kung fu means hard work which I also love. I don't think that I have ever attached relax and have fun with it before. The fun part for sure but not the relax part. How do you relax and work hard at the same time? I think that when I figure this out, I will be ready to take my kung fu to the next level. I am always trying to be better, faster, smarter, smoother..... so maybe if I stop trying so hard and just do it, I will become faster, better, smarter and smoother!! I have probably been told hundreds of times in my life to relax but I think it is beginning to sink in. Now I just have to figure out how......hmmmm. This will be where the real work begins. I think that my new mantra will be 'Just Relax", when I am doing anything and everything. If I can think relax then it will be a step in the right direction. It must be just like being positive, if you think positively then positive things happen. So if I think relax, then relaxing will happen! We'll see what my chucks think of my new relaxing attitude.

My computer cat!

I wish I had a picture of my crazy cat sitting on my computer, this will have to do. So I write this really nice blog about my emotions ruling my world and my big plans to take back control and I wasn't sure how to end it. I decided to putter around my kitchen, making potato salad for supper and cleaning, etc. and in the meantime thinking about what to write next. Seems like a good plan, right? Well, I was nearly finished and I look over at my laptop and there was my adorable cat, sitting on my keyboard! My computer automatically saves so I wasn't too worried, at first, upon closer inspection, it seems like my crafty little critter managed to erase and delete the whole thing and then start a new one! Of course, he didn't type any real words, just lot's of plus signs.
I will take my cue from him and remember that if you are positive then positive comes back at you. I will continue to live that way, even when there are bumps in the road.
:)
This is what Rascal has to say:
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Sifu Kichko

The real path towards mastery

My work world is definitely pushing the limits of my training lately. My spiritual and psychological part of my training that is. I have been struggling to remain calm and confident and not get too excited about what I see happening around me or worrying too much about what may be happening to me. I have been practicing my breathing each and every day and trying really hard not to wig out. So far, I have only wigged out a little, once, for a few minutes and it was kind of embarrassing after. It really didn't make me feel better but it did help me get things into perspective.
I am not in charge of what others do and say, I can only be in charge of me, what I do and say and how I react to others.
I am responsible for how I treat others, treating everyone that I encounter everyday with fairness and kindness. That is my goal.
Each day when I wake up, I decide that I am going to be a better person at the end of the day and consciously work towards that all day.
When I surround myself with people that expect more of me than I do, I know that I am in the right place to work towards mastery. When I find myself surrounded by people who expect nothing from me, I need to hold on to my path with both hands, and work way harder to attain mastery. For me that is the real test of my resolve. Can I remain on my path when not in the perfect place, surrounded by like-minded people? Of course I can! The hard work that it takes to stay on the path is what mastery is all about. 
Pssst
HAPPY BIRTHDAY CANADA!

Boot Camp......

.......from the other side!
 I had a great day! I got to hang out with some of my black belt friends, attend a hard core fitness class and watch some amazing students push themselves to the limit. It doesn't get any better than that!
In other years, I have gone and participated, pushed myself through the day, dreading  and then enjoying each new seminar. Yesterday was different as I push myself in different less obvious ways now. I am not only looking to get the job done, I am concentrating on how to get there in the most efficient manner, learning as much from the experience as humanly possible. I learned that I would like to learn more about grappling, as it is totally foreign to me to try out moves with someone on top of me. You have to be aware of how you move and how that affects how they can or can not move, I think. I have been concentrating on what I feel like when I move, I think that doing more grappling will take that to a whole new level.
I enjoyed helping with the fitness test and watching the students put their all into each exercise (yes, there was some cheer leading involved). I like sharing tips and tricks on how to get the most out of your muscles or how to improve your time.
I enjoyed the end of the day, being part of that energy bubble, experiencing other people's euphoria as they realize what they have accomplished, and of course, reviewing the entire experience with my daughter on the way home.
All in all a great day! I am already looking forward to next year!!!!

Negativity/Positivity

  I have been troubled for the last couple of weeks and I am not even sure that I know how to write about it. I am going to try anyways, in hopes of getting it out of my brain.
I keep encountering super negative people. Not the kind that you can ignore, the kind that invade your world and have you wondering how on earth you have attracted such a person. I have a friend that firmly believes that you get back what you put out there, with that in mind, what am I putting out there? Am I attracting negative people through my actions and words? How does that work? My daily goal is to have positive interactions with all the people that I meet each day. Are the people that are negative a test of my resolve? Or maybe I have nothing to do with what is happening for them and I am just a witness to what they are throwing out there. Perhaps they are placed in my path so I can show them the other side, you know, the side where everything has a solution and there is nothing we can't conquer! And being mean and negative  with others is not the answer.         

I can chose to ignore them, I can chose to not feed into their negativity, I can share my thoughts and believes...... I realize that there are many things that I can do. I can also challenge all who read my blog to encounter each day with the goal of having a positive impact on just one person. Here are some examples: strike up a conversation with another person while standing in line (you can start with - hey I have this crazy friend that thinks we can make this world a better place to live if we chat with one another in the line up), share a friendly greeting with a stranger at the gym ( strangers are just friends that you haven't met yet), help someone take their groceries to their car, be empathetic when you do meet someone that is having a bad day (you may be the one thing that convinces them that all is not lost). It is just like acts of kindness, just amped up a bit.
Being friendly doesn't hurt one little bit and if you are lucky, you'll get a smile in return :)

Friend

Mother Earth

I spent a good portion of my afternoon digging in my yard, getting rid of weeds, and planting a few vegetables. I loved it! It looks nice and fresh and there is something about it that brings peace to my soul.

Leadership

What is a good leader? How do you get to be a better leader? Why do people follow one person's example and not another person's?

I don't know the answer to these questions, I just more questions. I know what I am passionate about and I know that when I share that passion, I can inspire others to try harder, be more creative and not give up. I know that I can convince people to try new things and have hope, when I share my passion. Most of my experience in leadership has been face to face, allowing me to use my facial expressions, body language and tone of voice to enhance my words. I like being able to see the reaction that I am having, looking for that frowning face that tells me that I need to explain more or that ah-ha look that tells me that I can move on. What I am not experienced in is trying to inspire and lead people using electronic devices. I can't tell if my message is being heard, understood or accepted, I have to move forward as if I have the full attention of my intended audience. Perhaps if I make a video and share it electronically, I can reach more of my audience?

Happy Mother's Day!

Happy Mother's Day Everyone!
 I have had a very good kung fu week. I am enjoying the morning classes and was happy that I got to attend black belt class and I Ho Chuan. I was not able to attend for a couple of weeks and that really helped appreciate how much I enjoy and learn from those classes. I think that if I could attend every week, then I may get complacent and not stay in the moment. When it is not always available, opportunities are easier to appreciate. In fact, I think everything is easier to appreciate if you consider not having it. I recently lost a friend to cancer and that loss has helped me appreciate everyone and everything in my life. Suddenly, the little things that were bugging me no longer mattered, the big things were what mattered. I have a family that I love, I have friends that I can share with and I have my kung fu (and my kung fu family), what more does a girl really need.
I am glad that I had an opportunity to count my blessings. I will miss my friend and do everything in my power to honor the path that he helped me see. :)

It couldn't get any better than this!

Saturday is my favorite day of the week because I spend most of the day at the kwoon. I begin my day with a hearty breakfast and some lovely tea and then it is off to the kid's class. They have so much energy and willingness to try just about anything, that it is hard not to laugh out loud from the shear joy of it. There is a thirty minute break where I usually tell myself that it is a good time to do forms but I usually end up visiting with my friends, talking over the class or just catching up. The next class is tai chi, which I joined to improve my flow. I am not sure if that happened but I do know that I am calmer, and I am able to settle myself down much quicker in stressful situations. Tai chi also helps me feel centered and focused in all that I do. After that, it is time for a quick apple for energy that I will definitely need in the fitness class. I joined this class to improve my over all fitness and discovered that it is so fun to exercise with others who are willing to push themselves just as hard or harder than you do and do it with a sense of comradery that is second to none. It is definitely a high point of the day. If I am lucky, my partner and I will share a little lunch after this, talk about our week and plan what we want to focus on in open training. I love open training because you never really know what it is going to be like or who else you are going to get to train with. Sometimes, it is quiet so it is a very focused time, lots of forms and time for improving my eye for detail. Sometimes it is jammed packed with people, talking, laughing, teasing, sparring, teaching and just enjoying being there. And sometimes, it is a combination of it all. I just love being there.
So all this brings me to yesterday, WOW! What a fantastic day!!! It was like we took all my favorite things to do and amped it up big time. I arrived two hours early so that I could do some pre-planned nun chuck work with one of my friends, the time just flew. Suddenly it was time for the kids to arrive and it was time to run and play and have a good time. I think that the kids had a good time, too. I loved that we had lots of older kids helping the kids, that truly made the event cool for me. I loved seeing all the families wandering around, visiting and getting to know one another. Tai chi was super cool too! We did the whole form (it takes about 20 minutes if you do it right) three times all together, I think there was about 8 or 10 of us. I usually practice tai chi by myself and the energy generated by having the whole group together was phenomenal, it made the hairs on my arm stand up. On to the fitness class, I am not sure what I expected but it wasn't a packed room willing to give this class a try. Now that was some serious energy!!! I loved that so many people came out and gave it their all. We worked our butts off (as usual) and it was too fun having new and old training partners in the group. Of course, Sifu Stoddard is absolutely amazing when it comes to getting a group moving and having a good time. I have no idea how she puts together such a fun filled, work your butt off with a smile on your face class but it totally works. It's like you don't even know how hard your are working because you are having so much fun ( until you "take it to the floor" and that is a story for a different day). I topped off that part of my day with the dragon dance. I wasn't sure that I had any energy left in me (5 hours of sleep followed by 5 hours of non-stop kung fu) but I do like the dragon. It was challenging at first, remembering how to move together and not trip anyone else on the team, but we seemed to find our rhythm and no one got hurt. When it was over, I found myself eagerly discussing more practices so we could get ready for Canada day. It should prove to be an excellent way to get ready for summer.
I go off to work after the dragon dance, it was hard driving away when I really just wanted to go play the dragon game again and have some more popcorn. I decided that if I had any gas left in my tank that I would return after my shift to help close off the day. My daughter helped me with this as she wanted to go back in the evening to do more forms, that was all the energy boost that I needed. I arrived shortly after 11 pm, to find a very high energy group, doing forms, running suicides (?) and generally pushing themselves a little bit more. I jumped in, completely addicted to the energy and started doing nun chucks with a few people that turned into a group that just kept growing. We decided when there was about thirty minutes left that we should do all of our forms in the order that we learned them. We had a really good time, the energy was high,(there was lot's of sweat) and we finished the night with unity and vigor as the clock struck twelve and we did Hsing Chien.What a great way to end a great day :)