Tired

What to say, what to say????
Too tired for words today :)

Steps

I am not sure what steps forward I made today. I completed tasks, errands, checked things off my list but it all felt like maintenance not forward movement. In these moments, it is hard to remember that a journey of 1000 miles begins with a single step. I didn't stop, I kept on trying, so I guess that is something. Tomorrow looks to be a day of forms and children, sounds like a good way to pass the time.

Questions

why do you do kung fu? what do you get out of it? are you in it for you? are you doing what you think you should be doing? are you doing it because someone else thinks you should?
what keeps you there? day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year? is it because you love kung fu so much that you can't function without it? is it because you love how you feel when you are doing a form, executing a kick, putting together a combination? is it because you love how you feel when you push yourself further than you ever have before (beyond the arbitrary limits you set for yourself)? is it because you love hanging out with people who love pushing themselves too?
looking for motivation? answer just a few of these questions honestly and you will find the answers!

My pets.....again!

I love my dogs! They make me smile everyday, they keep me company when I am alone and they love me unconditionally. They let me do my work out (most days :) ) and they happily follow me to the kitchen for breakfast afterwards. I love my cat too! Some days I'm sure that he thinks that he is a dog. He has never been around other cats, he was separated from his mom at two weeks and he doesn't do regular cat things (like ignore his people). This morning while I was doing my kicks, he jumped up wrapped up his paws around my leg, looked me in the eye, kinda looked like he was thinking Oh-oh and dropped to the floor. It was so funny because he wrapped his paws around at the exact moment that my leg was fully extended and the dogs looked at him like he was crazy for interrupting my kicks. All in all, another fun kung fu moment brought to you by my pet family.

Food

Just because I was talking about how well my food plan was working out, I had a terrible food day. I had my smoothie this morning after my workout and that was the last thing that was great of  my food intake. I can't really explain it, I just wanted everything in site. I do okay as far as intake went but it wasn't my best day. For example, I really wanted chips so I had almonds and some goat cheese (nice, normal for me, snack) and then a small bowl of chips. The whole day was like that, not really sure why, hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.
On the bright side, I totally have my motivation back and had no trouble getting up early and doing my workout.

Epic

What a great day! The energy was very high and very positive throughout the day, it was fun to see so many parents hanging out with their kids (some of them participating) and it was great to be around my peeps all day long. I enjoyed doing forms with my kung fu friends, I enjoyed visiting with some people that I don't get to see much of and I enjoyed being apart of our school today. The camaraderie, the joking, the support, the encouragement, it was all there and I loved it!!!!
On a more practical side, I completely forgot to take my book! So here it is, I started the day with some warm up forms: da ma hsing, lung, kempo - nice and slow - getting the body and muscles moving (no idea how many reps). Then my friend and I worked on a couple of forms together, picking some pieces apart and trying to do them better - starting and stopping many, many times (no idea how many reps). I moved on to Tai Chi where I did not stop doing the form for approximately one hour ( no idea how many reps). After that there was an amazing fitness - many kicks were done, sit ups, break falls, and all kinds of grappling exercises ( no idea how many kicks or sit ups). The kids game was organized chaos that I totally loved and then more forms with my partner for about an hour (no idea how many reps). I had a great day and I have a few sore muscles to remind over the next few days and I am off to bed with a smile on my face.

Pandamonium

I am really excited that tomorrow is Pandamonium. I think that we have all worked really hard to make tomorrow happen and tomorrow we will work together to show everyone who comes over a great time. It will be an epic day! As I write this my friends have begun their forms, I hope that they have a good few hours while I sleep, see you soon :)

Motivation found!

Today I met a young man who's life is immersed in devastation. His community has suffered many loses as has his family. It is so difficult to help a young person find reasons for living that has such deeply entrenched feelings of hopelessness and helplessness. This young man has asked for a better life, one where he can get an education and, for a time, live separate from his family and community. What courage, what bravery, what a humbling experience that I had today. I am truly blessed to have the opportunity to be in the presence of such determination. I feel like if he can talk steps each day to survive then I can get up in the morning and complete my requirements!!! In case you missed it....motivation found!

Teamwork

I have been thinking a lot about team work today and how we get people to work together. I think that I may have an idea! We need to get everybody working so hard and being so passionate about a common goal that they forget about their ego. I think that ego gets in the way, it makes us wonder - how come I didn't get noticed, how come I didn't get picked. We need to put that aside and worry about getting the job done and not compare ourselves to the next guy. Each one of us is very capable of being The One, we just have to look around, see what needs to be done and figure out how to get it done. It doesn't mean we won't ask lots of questions or get advise from someone who has done it before, it just means that we will do what it takes it get it done and not worry about the next guy. I believe the next guy, if he is looking with his eyes open, will see the leadership and follow along, become a leader themselves in the process.

Progress or not?

Today was much quieter than I thought that it would be. I was very tired today and needed to rest and relax for part of the day, well, mostly the morning. I got some things done this afternoon, not much but not nothing. I made a nice supper for my husband (Katie was at work) and spent some time working on one of my knitting projects. I feel like I am moving forward and starting to see a difference in some of my movements. I hope that I am improving :) Some days it feels like I'm standing still and other days it feels like I going forward in leaps and bounds. I wonder if everyone else is feeling the same sense of roller coastering!

Two days worth

Yesterday was a day fraught with forcing myself to stay on task and do some work that I would have rather avoided. Then I got home from work 20 minutes before class, no time to relax and transition to my homo life. It was all worth it when I went to black belt class and had a great time. We did some cool exercises to improve our kicks and did some even cooler stick moves, so worth the push to get there. Playing the Pandamonium game with my team mates was also a good time and interesting to see how other grown ups play. I spent the rest of the evening with Jim and stayed up too late but I had a good time :)
Today was a fairly mellow day at work, the kids were low key and the sun was shining. We had an opportunity spend some time outside this afternoon and that is always a new avenue to reach the unreachable. I have spent a mellow evening with my family, feeling like I am ready to charge into my days off and get some stuff done! Starting with a nice walk in the morning to feed some beautiful cats that I love :)

Sleepy

I have stayed up way passed my bedtime and I nearly forgot to blog, talk to you all tomorrow when I tell you about my today :)

I have been hacked!

I feel like I should dramatically but my hand over my heart and fall to the ground! I get up this morning and check my mail on my phone and I have 256 new emails, all of them saying Mail Delivery Failure. I had never seen anything like it! It was my more computer smart family that suggested that I was hacked, I couldn't do anything about it because I was also locked out. I called my server and reset my password and spent 20 minutes deleting all the garbage. If you received an email today from me (time stamped between 5 and 5:30 am), it was not me, I was otherwise occupied at that time. I don't understand why people would get any pleasure out of hacking into someone's elses account, but they must get something out of it!?!

I love my pets!

My pet family decided to help me with my workout this morning! First of all, while the dogs were outside, the cat (the usually loving Rascal) decided to grab as much of my yoga matt as he could in his paws (about half for the record), when I called him on it, he took off at the speed of light and tore around the living room and dining room. One set of weights and 50 sit ups done and the dogs are ready to come in! There was a little cat chasing that went on, narrowly missing me while I layed on the floor on my yoga matt!!! Another set done of weights and 50 sit ups. Next each one of the dogs had to come and clean my face while I was still laying on the floor of course. And on it went..... with all that help I managed 300 sit ups, 240 kicks, my weight routine which I have increased to three sets of 10 with 10lbs and Tai Chi. Thank you my pet my family :)

Warmth

I noticed today that not only was the sun shining, it was warm out. Until today the air remained cold, maybe chilly is a better description. I was out on Sunday afternoon walking on the trails and my sensitive lungs let me know that the air had still not warmed up much. Today I was out hanging with my work kids outside and I could totally tell that the air had finally warmed up. This means that I can do my forms outside, especially Tai Chi, and walk more outside which will really increase my mileage. I am secretly hoping to increase my daily steps from 10,000 to 15,000!

sit ups

I think that I need to change/improve my sit ups. Today I was doing my routine and it didn't seem as hard or challenging as it used to. Which, of course, makes sense! If you do the same exercise every day, you are bound to make some muscles and therefore the exercises are easier. Now, I know that the purpose of the whole thing isn't to make it harder/more challenging. But I'm thinking, if I'm going to do it anyways, I might as well make some killer abs while I'm at it! Any ideas anyone? I'm thinking of adding weights, as in, holding the weight while I sit up?

Shift work switch

Throughout my career I have changed holiday celebrations to different days many, many times. If one of us was working on a holiday, we would just celebrate on an alternate day. It has worked for us. This weekend I was off, not preplanned just my turn to be off for the weekend, and I figured it would be nice to be home for Mother's Day. I didn't take into account the youngest member of our family joining the shift work force. Katie has another job that requires her to work weekends and evenings, she still has her old job that is usually one of the weekend days. So today, she worked her day job and then worked the evening shift at her new job. We had to switch Mother's Day to yesterday. It was cool but different, and there were still presents which was good. Since it wasn't me that caused the switch it was a little odd, but I still had a lovely day. I got some things done around the house, had tea with my friend and had a nice walk with my dog. All in all, a good day!

Fun

What a fun day! The usual small children that always make me smile and laugh to start the day :) Followed by a lovely Tai Chi class, it was so relaxing today! Some errands and lunch and it was time to hang out with my peeps, oh yeah, and do a little cleaning. It is so fun to hang out with the team and work on a project and I think the place looks great! It was also fun to have the advanced black dragons to hang with. :)

Tai Chi

My world has tilted slightly and I am not really sure what to make of it. I noticed and so did Sifu Hayes, that when my world is not okay, I carry my center in my shoulders and upper chest. This causes the turtle effect and some really awkward movements on my part. The cool part? I could feel it. The not cool part? I really struggled to stop it. I did my Tai Chi form and that really helped to settle me down but didn't make it go away. When things are happening, I get in my head (think too much) and I have a difficult time getting out. I know Tai Chi will help, I just have to remind myself to stop and do it. Feel free to help me remember!

Under Armor

I bought a new pair of shoes yesterday, you guessed it, they are Under Armor!  I love them! They are light weight, comfortable and pretty :) I wore them all day today and they felt like they have been mine forever. There is nothing like a good pair of shoes.

More Change?

I may have grown a bit more today! I had a very challenging day and I chose to be true to myself and not react to all that was happening around me. It was very hard to not to give in and be visible upset, complain about how it was affecting me but I did it! It feels awesome!!!!! I stayed positive, I stayed me, and I stayed on task and I am so glad that I pushed through and didn't give in to the easy way.

Sleeplessness

Many of you have heard me talk about short change before, my struggle to cope/function when extremely tired continues. Usually, I come home from work at 11:30, get ready for bed and go to sleep. Now that is not enough sleep for me but I am surviving if not thriving. That has not always been the case, before I discovered more about me, I used to spend countless hours laying awake fretting about my life, making short change unmanageable. Since joining Kung Fu and especially the I Ho Chuan, I have not experienced that. I have discovered that as long as I complete my daily requirements, do my very best to be a better person and record my results, I don't fret at night. That was not the case last night, I couldn't sleep! Plain and simple! No worries, day looked good, I am grateful for all that I have in my life, and there I lay, half the night, awake! Needless to say, today was a long day!!!! Now it is bed time, requirements done and logged, I am a better person than I was when I got up this morning and I have counted my blessings. Good Night :)

No Pretending

I'm trying to pretend that I am not tired and cranky and it is not working, so off to bed for me, we'll chat tomorrow.

More forms news

I certainly had a great form day yesterday, some of it was kind of painful when I tried to get my body and brain on the same page but the results were fantastic. I learned some tips and tricks from Sifu Hayes last night and continue to learn more as I practice and more and more of his words come back to me. Does that ever happen to you? You get tonnes of great advise that you are not sure you can possibly take in, but you actually do and it comes back to you when you are ready for it? Well, I think that happened to me. I kept going back to Sifu with more questions and ended up with more information then I thought that I could assimilate, but I was wrong! It is all in my head and it will come out when it is ready, too cool!!!!
Anyways, back to my form...the things that he showed me has changed my flow, my trajectory, my feelings, my motivation to practice more....the list seems endless. I am excited to continue my practice tomorrow and see what happens. :)

Smoothie

I have been looking for the perfect smoothie for quite some time. I thought that I had it a year or so ago and then I embarked on a different journey to find out what kind of food my body likes and stopped making them because they had cow's milk and yogurt which my body doesn't like. So I ask everyone I can think of, I look it up on line, I try different things and nothing is as good without the dairy. The week before last I caught a cold and I was super sick, like in bed all day sick and I had no appetite at all but I definitely needed some nutrition. I think smoothie would work! Sifu Brinker told me that it is good to put broccoli in your smoothie because it is packed with all kinds of amazing nutrients, done. I like strawberries, raspberries and blueberries because they are yummy, done. I also like spinach, a lot, done. I added a bit of protein and some water and ta-da, the most amazing smoothie ever was born. I don't know if it healed me faster or anything like that (I really felt like I was on my death bed for several days!) but I definitely got some nutrient in me and it tasted good. I went back to work on Saturday last week, still sniffling and all but okay and I decided to keep the smoothie in my daily routine. I have had a smoothie everyday since then and been quite pleased with the results. Lots of energy, stayed full and satisfied until lunch and not that many calories. Until today......I figure why not have one of your tried and true breakfast choices instead, what was I thinking? I have literally dragged my butt through this entire day, forcing myself to stay busy and keep moving, I didn't even realize what I had done differently until I was re-capping my day with my husband. I will not skip my smoothie again because today was not fun!

Kids and forms

I had an interesting day in the kid's classes. I tried something that Sifu Vantuil mentioned last week, two obstacle courses and two teams, it was so fun. The kids had a great time and practiced being all the different animals of kung fu while they were at it. In the beginner black dragon class we did bag work and it was reminiscent of classes run by Sifu Frietag when I was a white belt. It was great, the kids worked their butts off, sweated and had a good time. It was very intense and I liked it.
I have been working on my forms and starting to get to know them in a way that I can tell when the stance isn't quite right or sometimes I rush a move to get to the next one, I noticed both of those things today and it felt pretty cool. I feel like both forms are at a turning point this week and I like it. :)