obstacles and misconceptions

This year was definitely a year of obstacles, I spent more time than I would like to admit thinking about quitting. Not because I don't like being there, not because I don't enjoy all the people that have become a part of my life but because it was hard! It is as simple and as complicated as that. Sometimes it is hard to get to class because of other commitments and sometimes it is hard to go to class because I haven't been there. Sometimes it is hard to get my requirements done because of my life, sometimes it is hard to get them done because I haven't been doing them.
So this year was hard! I think that it was supposed to be.
I have spent a lot of time trying to figure things out, what do I want, how do I get it, stuff like that. I have come to only one conclusion - it is best to keep quiet and see what happens sometimes than to act or speak too soon. I have only recently come to this and sometimes I still forget to keep my mouth shut.

So some of the misconceptions of the year look like this:
I thought it would be cool to blog every day - wrong! I ended up blogging a whole bunch of googley-goop, instead of the real important stuff.
I thought I would do my hand form one thousand times and have this great enlightening - wrong! I got super frustrated, not really sure that I like the form anymore and discovered that I have a tonne to work on.
I thought that I would get tired of doing tai chi everyday, totally didn't happen, in fact, if I miss a day, I may get a little cranky!!
Life pulled me away from the kwoon for a bit, I figured it would be okay - wrong! I missed everyone and everything and when I went back I cried cause so much had happened without me!
I thought that achieving something was more important that improving - wrong again! I seem to keep re-learning this lesson or it doesn't stick or something, I know that I need to feel like I am getting better for anything to matter. I seem to keep getting caught up on the goal and forgetting the most important part, the journey!!!!
So that is it horse team, I have learned that I must follow only one schedule - my own. I have learned that I don't always have to share my opinion, I can be quiet. I have learned that I will get there, when I am supposed to be there and not a moment sooner :)