Bullies....big and small

Bullying can take on many forms, but the one that I am confronted with the most is when someone in a position of power states that they won't give you what you want/need unless you do what they say. Even if this is delivered in a joking manner, it's not funny! It leaves you wondering, do they really mean it? Should I have to kiss up to get the next promotion? Should I do things that go against what I believe in, in order to "succeed"?
I realize that there is a certain amount of diplomacy required when dealing with bosses and stuff, but how far does one have to go outside their comfort zone to move forward? What do you need to do to get your ideas listened to?
I think the answer to all my questions is to be true to yourself and don't forget that the other person is the one with the agenda. They may want to look good in front of others (perhaps their boss) and they have things that they want to accomplish that have nothing to do with you. I think that doing the best job that you know how to do is the answer and don't do anything that you are not comfortable doing. And of course, don't use the same tactics on the people that you are in charge of.
I think that it is also important to help others stand up to bullying. As I was telling a story to my mentor about someone who was trying to intimidate me to get what they wanted, she pointed out that, incredibly, the witness to the whole thing did nothing as well. Bullies are fueled by acceptance, spoken or unspoken, they believe they are right and if no one stands up to tell them otherwise, it just confirms their stance. My message today is let's tell bullies that there are better more affective ways of getting their needs met.