Challenge for the Soul

The first time I saw this challenge, I picked out the things that were outside my comfort zone and I dismissed it. I didn't give it another thought until someone mentioned it and said that I would benefit from it. So, I took another look and decided that challenges were for going outside our comfort zones.

The first day turned out to easier that I thought. It was Saturday and I spent most of the day at Kung Fu, so giving out authentic compliments seemed natural. The fact that I had to be aware of them was a bit different.
The second day, acts of kindness, was another one that was inside my zone and something that I have been working on for a while now. I committed many different kinds of acts; kindness to mother earth by collecting litter, kindness through words of encouragement, kindness to strangers and kindness to my friends and family. The whole day left me feeling warm inside and thinking that I had a positive impact on my world.
On the third day, I pored my feelings into a couple of letters to my family. They were both touched by the sentiment. At first, I felt kinda cheap because I only did it because of the challenge. Then I really paid attention to the impact it had on them and the reason I wrote the letters seemed irrelevant.
Day 4, make a list of all that I'm grateful for. I thought about it all day and then made my list before bed. It was a good positive way to end my day.
Day 5, the hug day, hug a least 10 different people. I consider myself a touchy person, I hug, I touch when I talk, I punch, I grapple, I comfort with my hands.... Anyways, it was awkward having to reach outside my circle and ask for hugs. I even hugged a team mate that I have never hugged before. I think that it was okay as long as it was spontaneous but once it was planned and thought out, it didn't seem comfortable anymore. But enough about me, the people I hugged seemed to really appreciate the gesture. They didn't know it was pre-planned, they just appreciated it for what it was. It was a good day to pay attention to how I was received compared to how I was feeling.
On the sixth day, I had to turn all my negative thought into positive ones. It turned out to be more difficult than I anticipated. My work day consisted of dealing with a staff member's mistake and how others were reacting to it. My struggle was with the other people's reaction and how negative they were and then my negative thoughts as a reaction to them. What a nasty circle. It is disturbing how easy and quickly things can go in a negative direction. It left me wondering why isn't it as easy to be positive? Why is it more comfortable to say disparaging remarks than to speak up and re-direct the comments in a positive direction? Yet, if the person in question is in front of us, we avoid the truth (our true thoughts and feelings) and lie in an attempt to protect their feelings. Is this learned behavior? This day made my realize how hard I work to stay positive and be honest. Does this mean that I am a naturally negative person? I sure hope not!
Day 7 - Me day! Sounds easy, be nice to myself and make a list of all the qualities that make me unique. I struggled with the list, it was way outside my comfort zone. I didn't know what to write, it took a lot of searching to figure out how I see myself, I am not sure that I know yet. I did do one thing for me, it was not as easy as I thought either. The whole time, I had to keep saying, 'I do not feel guilty'. I did manage but it was a challenge.

So, what did I learn this week?
I think that being a good person and having a positive impact on my world is something that I need to work on everyday. I don't think that I will ever be done, goal achieved! I think that each day I will improve but never be finished trying to get better.